Secre Posted February 11, 2021 Share Posted February 11, 2021 So I've been looking for a fanfiction I read when I was a teenager for ages. First for myself and then for my foster sister. I could remember the name of the fic, but the site it used to be on is no longer alive. So I've been looking for back doors into it, to no avail. So my brother is helping to clean out my parents home in order to make it safe for my mother when she finally gets home from hospital. And he finds a load of old binders. Many of which have fanfiction in them. So he sends me the names and lo and behold, one of them is that fanfic I have been looking for!! So I get very excited and bounce around a lot, all the while my brother is trying to persuade me to let him burn it and I'm going NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! But that sets me thinking. If I had it printed, then I must have had it saved somewhere. And I have one single very old pen drive stick that I used to use to save private stuff on at work before we got given Home Drives. So I go rummaging. And I find it in a pencil case... because apparently, I am almost as much of a hoarder as my mother is. And even better, I find the bleeding fanfic on there that I have been searching high and bloody low for!!! SUCCESS!!! The fanfiction by the way is Harry Potter and the Year of Living Stupidity. It's a rather ridiculous parody fiction that has most of the Hogwarts Professors as incompetents, Harry as an attention seeking brat, Ron as an absolute moron and Hermione as a cat because the Hogwarts staff were too incompetent to change her back in second year. Sirius came back as a half-ghost because the afterlife was boring. Oh and Narcissa forces Lucius to get a job at Hogwarts as a janitor because Voldemort is eating them out of house and home. I'm not kidding, it's ridiculous. "But near the beginning of the school year, Harry and Ron had messed around with some old curses they'd got from a book Harry had sneaked out of the restricted section in the library one night under the Invisibility Cloak. In Lupin's opinion, handing that cloak over to Harry had been akin to giving a psychopath a chainsaw, a machete, and a copy of Mutilation for Fun and Profit, but that was old Dumbledore for you. Anyway, something had (unsurprisingly) gone wrong while Harry and Ron were playing with these illegal, terrifically dangerous curses, and Hermione got caught in the crossfire. Whatever spell had struck her had both rekindled and intensified the effects of the Polyjuice Potion she'd taken incorrectly in her second year. In short, it seemed as if she was now a cat for life, particularly since the highly incompetent staff of Hogwart's either couldn't figure out what to do for her condition or couldn't be bothered." Angeló, jellysundae and Nielo 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jellysundae Posted February 12, 2021 Share Posted February 12, 2021 18 hours ago, Secre said: all the while my brother is trying to persuade me to let him burn it and I'm going NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA. Lost it at this point, sorry. This is a fabulous success story though, well done! Secre 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Secre Posted February 12, 2021 Author Share Posted February 12, 2021 3 minutes ago, jellysundae said: HAHAHAHAHAHA. Lost it at this point, sorry. This is a fabulous success story though, well done! I think we are a family of pyromaniacs... or just equally frustrated at dad not putting the bleeding heating on!! I was rather pleased to put it mildly!! I've been searching for that bleeding fic for months!! I may have to re-read it to make sure it's not offensive and I won't get murdered by my foster mother! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jellysundae Posted February 12, 2021 Share Posted February 12, 2021 4 minutes ago, Secre said: I think we are a family of pyromaniacs... or just equally frustrated at dad not putting the bleeding heating on!! Surely he's caved this week!!! It's flippin' freezing! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Secre Posted February 12, 2021 Author Share Posted February 12, 2021 3 minutes ago, jellysundae said: Surely he's caved this week!!! It's flippin' freezing! Apparently not... which is why my brother has been hunting for anything vaguely flammable!! jellysundae 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jellysundae Posted February 12, 2021 Share Posted February 12, 2021 1 minute ago, Secre said: Apparently not... which is why my brother has been hunting for anything vaguely flammable!! Who needs the army to toughen you up, Secre's dad is on it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Secre Posted February 12, 2021 Author Share Posted February 12, 2021 3 hours ago, jellysundae said: Who needs the army to toughen you up, Secre's dad is on it! I can't talk. I'm sat in two jumpers and our heating is on!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jellysundae Posted February 12, 2021 Share Posted February 12, 2021 2 hours ago, Secre said: I can't talk. I'm sat in two jumpers and our heating is on!!! I've got my dressing gown on, on top of a massive jumper, as well as having the heater on full; your dad'd have no time for me. x'D Secre 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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