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Lost my hat (but found it)


Shane for Wax

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My hat is one of my most cherished items. It is also something of a 'comfort item'. If you're familiar with them, it's usually for those with bad anxiety or PTSD or autism etc., to kind of hold onto or put on to feel safer, or to ground themselves in the present. Well, my hat is that. Next to my stuffed animal I have had since I was like 10. But stuffed animals aren't really accepted for adults to carry around so my hat has morphed into that.

 

I already have pretty bad anxiety, but to lose it tore me to pieces. My dad doesn't understand how much it means to me to have it, but I eventually got him to ask around at the last places I had been (which weren't many, I've only been out of the house twice in the past week or so when I lost it). It's at the hair dresser's when I got my haircut I must have accidentally left it there somehow. My memory isn't the greatest.

 

Only problem is I have to wait until tomorrow for my dad to get it. So I have to spend the night as anxious as I was last night and worried about having another episode and only having my stuffed animal to rely on to calm me down. :(

 

Surely other people have comfort items too???

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I've been in a relationship for almost five years. He was an international student who was studying at my University but just recently graduated and therefore, had to go back home to his own country. (He had English language school and a double major like me, and therefore was here longer than the typical three years.) The relationship was (and still is) taken very seriously and we even moved into an apartment together.

 

Now that he's moved back, I'm living alone in a city where I don't really have any friends. We still talk on Skype all the time, but anyone who's had a relationship go long distance can tell you that it's not the same as being together physically. That, and considering the 14 hour time difference between us, I'm going to bed as he's waking up and vice versa.

 

One of the things that he left me was a little stuffed cat. I take it everywhere (though I keep it in my bag where nobody can see it) and sleep with it in my arms. I get really depressed and anxious because of the loneliness, and it really helps.

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I understand you, Shane. I have a tiny stuffed monkey which used to be my "security blanket" when I was a teen. One day I though I had lost it and I actually couldn't sleep. I shook all night and ended up having nightmares. Luckily my best friend found it the very next day (it was in a really stupid place in my bedroom -_- ). So I feel you.

 

Just try to focus on the fact that you will have it very, very soon. Picture the hair dresser, picture your hat in there, in a safe place, just waiting for you. If you take any anxiety medication, that would be a nice time to take some. I know how hard it can be. I wish you the best, You'll pull through!

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I've been in a relationship for almost five years. He was an international student who was studying at my University but just recently graduated and therefore, had to go back home to his own country. (He had English language school and a double major like me, and therefore was here longer than the typical three years.) The relationship was (and still is) taken very seriously and we even moved into an apartment together.

 

Now that he's moved back, I'm living alone in a city where I don't really have any friends. We still talk on Skype all the time, but anyone who's had a relationship go long distance can tell you that it's not the same as being together physically. That, and considering the 14 hour time difference between us, I'm going to bed as he's waking up and vice versa.

 

One of the things that he left me was a little stuffed cat. I take it everywhere (though I keep it in my bag where nobody can see it) and sleep with it in my arms. I get really depressed and anxious because of the loneliness, and it really helps.

They say that even hugging an inanimate object has proven to lessen anxiety and sometimes even release the same hormones we get hugging a animate object (like an animal or another human) so I definitely see where it would help in loneliness too! I have gone thru a few LDR and they aren't easy. Have you thought of investing in some of the items that are in sync with each other thru the internet? They have a pillow that if you hug it, your partner will notice you hugging it cause it will light up and stuff and vice versa.

 

 

I understand you, Shane. I have a tiny stuffed monkey which used to be my "security blanket" when I was a teen. One day I though I had lost it and I actually couldn't sleep. I shook all night and ended up having nightmares. Luckily my best friend found it the very next day (it was in a really stupid place in my bedroom -_- ). So I feel you.

 

Just try to focus on the fact that you will have it very, very soon. Picture the hair dresser, picture your hat in there, in a safe place, just waiting for you. If you take any anxiety medication, that would be a nice time to take some. I know how hard it can be. I wish you the best, You'll pull through!

Unfortunately meds have never been prescribed, mainly because I had been on depression meds too but then they didn't work out (auditory hallucinations and stuff) and my physiology and the fact I take multiple narcotics tends to take me out of the running. I should be on them given my PTSD and everything else but one of the meds I was on for heart problems also had an off-label interaction as something for ptsd which screwed me up to now i'm more scared to take anymore psych meds than I am not to have that help. heh.

 

I'm probably not going to sleep tonight even with my stuffed dog. I had a bad dream/nightmare the night before my therapist appointment and then woke up to find my hat missing which just made it worse. Heh.

 

But thank you I appreciate the kind words! <3

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Well that isn't quite the same as having a comfort object. But thank you.

 

But at least mine is finally back in my hands. Got it back on Saturday and I've done a lot better with it back.

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Hugging always brings me comfort. You're not alone :D

 

That's why I miss my boyfriend :(

 

He was so nice to hug. </3

I have a very close friend (a male friend I've know all my life)...my religion has helped me a lot after my Father died last year.

 

He gives the greatest hugs ever!! He says, "You do not do a side hug. There is too much negative energy when you do so. While hugging someone you care about...you want your hearts to be against each other-to align as one."

 

Who knew a Hasidim (Orthodox Jew-very pious he is) would say something like that?

 

And Shane, I'm glad you got your hat back! That's great!!I'm happy for you. <3

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