Body Image

[Lady Lyuba]

No matter what body type you have, you're going to run into trouble. Skinny girls like me get just as much grief over the plus sized girls. People automatically assume we starve ourselves when we just have fast metabolisms. I've even had to deal with being called a "skank" just because of the way I dress and my body type. I do not try to attract boys, in fact the thought of having a boyfriend repulses me (I still havent quite grown up yet). I eat a balanced diet, and do lots of excercise. My light weight is healthy for my short size of 5'3" (yes, I am faerie sized). Currently I am trying to build up some more muscle in the gym. Not because of weight issues, I'm just out of shape and could use a little improvement in my arms and legs.

 

Society is still going on with their "conventional ideas of beauty" and the fact that everyone is imperfect and must have cosmetic surgery blah blah blah blah blah. TV and movies only show one type of body, ONE specific style, etc.

 

But you know, back in the middle ages, being skinny was not attractive at all! Soceity's views DO change over time, and different parts of the world have different ideas of beauty. Once upon a time, pale skin was attractive, because it was a sign of wealth. Now everyone's tanning themselves because "tans are sexy" when they are hazardous to your health (though a little is good so long as it is from the sun where you get your vitamin D). Larger body sizes were hailed as beautiful because it meant you were rich and could afford all kinds of food and you were well cared for, while if you were skinny, you were just a peasant working in the fields with less to eat. Then as time progressed it was all about being skinny just to look good in bikinis. But, some parts of the world still retain some old views. It all boils down to where you live in the world - however, many have adapted the American point of view.

 

There is a PacSun in a mall near my house. I'm not into the mall so much - I have issues with teenagers, particularly girls (No offense to anyone, I mean teenagers in general and the attitude that they display. Certainly not all teens are irritating - I have plenty of younger friends that I love). Target has some clothes that fit me, and they are a little more reasonable. I've cycled between Kohl's, JC Penney's, and Old Navy for several years now, plus whatever hand-me-downs I get from friends. 32C-D is almost impossible to find. 32 anything is hard to find. I used to wear a 32, so I can sympathize.

 

And..this is pretty sad: Yeah, I AM a bit of a mall/shopping addict, but blame the fact I was raised around it. And this store where I get a lot of my clothing from, XXI, mainly only has stuff for skinny girls. It may not be a problem for a petite like me, but for the majority of young women, it is. Luckily there is another store called "Deb" which has styles for all body types. It's a real nice place, but not very common.

[YukiHitsugaya]

*sigh* I'm skinny as well, I"ve never tipped the scale more than 100pounds..It's horrible, because I'm short as well, so 00 jeans are too large in the hips and too long in the legs. (I'm only 5 feet to 5'. For some reason my doctors can't decide. They all keep getting different heights around 5 feet to 5 foot 2 sometimes)

 

Nothing is made for short skinny girls. I'll say it, when the scale does go up to around 98, I freak. I hate being over 100 pounds. I've got a really fast metabolism as well. (Doctor did blood tests, everything is normal.)

 

Wish the media would stop telling guys that girls bodies are for sexual stuff only. It means I'll be very unlikey to have a BF where I live, because all the guys have been exposed to the sexualization of girls and all want girls who dress in clothes that they shouldn't.

I remember seing a girl at my school, who was very OBVIOUSLY wearing one of those bra's that make you look 2x bigger. She looked horrible in it, and it wasn't even worn right. You could tell her "things" were faked.

 

But an "idea body" is bad. There's actually a petition on change.org, asking Seventeen to put images of real girls (without airbrushing anything) on the cover.

[Lady Lyuba]

*sigh* I'm skinny as well, I"ve never tipped the scale more than 100pounds..It's horrible, because I'm short as well, so 00 jeans are too large in the hips and too long in the legs. (I'm only 5 feet to 5'. For some reason my doctors can't decide. They all keep getting different heights around 5 feet to 5 foot 2 sometimes)

 

Nothing is made for short skinny girls.

 

Pretty true there. I have a great dress, but it is so long I trip over it when I wear it and I cannot wear it to very many places - the fact it is strapless only makes it worse. Shame, because it is such a pretty dress. Jeans are a HUGE problem for me - it's in fact one of the reasons I mostly wear dresses and skirts and leggings instead. Everything is too long or too big. :( The only pairs of jeans that fit me will fall down if I don't wear a belt.

 

Heh, I'm under 100 too. :P Last time the doctors checked my weight it was only....98.

 

But an "idea body" is bad. There's actually a petition on change.org, asking Seventeen to put images of real girls (without airbrushing anything) on the cover.

 

That is a wonderful idea! If I find it, I'm certainly signing it. It's time REAL women's bodies got recognized!

[moni_rawr]

Yuki - There's actually some 00 jeans that come in short, regular, and long. I'm usually around the short size, but like wearing the regular so that I can sit on the floor without having my legs showing. I'm 5'2" and weigh around 92lbs right now, so they would fit you nicely.

And when things fit nicely, but are too long...do a simple sew on the bottom to hem them up, or you can cut them, then hem so that they're not folded up too much when you hem them.

 

Lady - I LOVE Deb. They finally have one here in Arizona, so I go there occasionally, but I still find that most of the jeans are too large for me. I also don't wear skinny jeans...prefer bootcut.

[Lady Lyuba]

Lady - I LOVE Deb. They finally have one here in Arizona, so I go there occasionally, but I still find that most of the jeans are too large for me. I also don't wear skinny jeans...prefer bootcut.

 

I'm actually quite a fan of bootcut too, those nice flares on your legs... :) Though skinny is also nice because you can wear boots over them (which I do a lot). Heh...I better stop before going off topic. Back to what is more important! :laughingsmiley:

[kyedigsme]

I think bootcut jeans help with making you appear taller, so I generally go for them. Most of my jeans/pants/capris/shorts are too big in the waist, so I need to wear a belt, or tie them tight if they come with a drawstring tie in the front. I've even resorted to safety pins to make size 3 skirts fit. I have a pair of size 1 jeans that fits perfectly without a belt, but then if I go to the store and look at a different brand, a 0 doesn't fit right without a belt. It's extremely irritating. I think sizes should be standardized.

 

The Seventeen petition sounds interesting. Maybe I'll look that up... Magazines like that make me sick. I've never felt I was pretty. In fact, I remember looking in the mirror at age 9 and hating what I saw. I don't bother with makeup (I'm terrible at applying it, it's time consuming, and I don't think it helps me that much), and although my husband finds that appealing and says that I'm beautiful, I still hate how I look. And then the media shows all these perfect, beautiful people, and I just can't stand it.

[cornstar]

I think we live in a very absurd society. People should not be brought down based on their looks, as long as you are perfectly fit and healthy, I would not care how you look. And by fit and healthy I mean, you are not harming your body with excess high fructose corn syrup and such.

[Rebecca~]

I think we live in a very absurd society. People should not be brought down based on their looks, as long as you are perfectly fit and healthy, I would not care how you look. And by fit and healthy I mean, you are not harming your body with excess high fructose corn syrup and such.

The problem is that you can't tell if someone is fit and healthy by how they luck- EVER. Lots of slender people eat crap food and get praised for looking so healthy, and vice versa for fat people.

And really, if someone wants to eat badly, that is their choice- they shouldn't be brought down and made to feel ashamed of themselves for doing so. People should be allowed to love themselves no matter what.

[cornstar]

Of course. What I was trying to say is that you can not judge people by their looks, nor should they even be judging in the first place. As long as a person is healthy that is fine.

[Rebecca~]

Of course. What I was trying to say is that you can not judge people by their looks, nor should they even be judging in the first place. As long as a person is healthy that is fine.

As long as a person is healthy, they shouldn't be insulted- but if someone is NOT healthy (ie, fat?) you can insult them all you want. Is that what you're saying?

 

People don't have an obligation to be healthy- that is also what I am saying. There are lots of people who can't AFFORD to be healthy. When you are barely making enough to feed your family at all, you can't say that you aren't going to eat processed foods, or eliminate foods with HFCS, etc. These foods are the cheapest, and it's better to be fed than to be hungry but eat unprocessed foods.

I recently went shopping for pasta sauce. I read the labels on every single brand, and only ONE did not have added sugar or HFCS. It cost more than twice as much for a smaller bottle than some of the other ones. I am priviledged enough to be able to afford that, but so many can't. You think it's all right to insult them?

HFCS is in everything now- the production of it has gone up 1100% in the past 10 years. Unless you have money to buy unprocessed foods, and the time to go looking for foods that don't have HFCS, it's practically impossible to eliminate it from your diet.

 

And really, when it comes down to it, someone doesn't have to be healthy. It is to their detriment over time, yes, but they have no obligation to be healthy. And you can never tell if someone is healthy or not by looking at them.

People are fat for so many reasons. Gland problems, not having money, being depressed, or being disabled, etc, etc, etc. Some fat people are incredible fit and active, but people don't believe them.

 

I really want to explain this properly. Regardless of someone being fit or healthy or not, people never, ever deserve to be insulted for who they are. They don't deserve ugly looks. They don't deserve to have people look at them and think "what a lazy slob", or "if only s/he got off their lazy butt", or "why aren't they eating a salad?", etc. People should be accepted for who they are, always, regardless of their health.

[vandalize]

Okay, I don't want to upset anyone or anything but.

Firstly, I agree that no one should get hated on because of their body image/weight etc. Also, something that really irks me is that people seem to forget there's a flipside to this debate. I'm sure it's been mentioned, but when someone calls someone out on being overweight it's rude and disgusting, but if someone is targeted because they're small it's not a big deal.

 

I've seen so many Facebook status about how "Only dogs go for bones, real men like curves", and that "Size 0 girls should seriously eat hamburgers". I don't think that's acceptable either. I'm pretty petite and I get called small/tiny/thin all the time. Granted, it doesn't really bother me or anything, but if people walked around calling those who are larger "big" or "large" that would be considered rude.

 

I don't know if that makes sense or anything. But I think people should just be healthy.

[Rebecca~]

Okay, I don't want to upset anyone or anything but.

Firstly, I agree that no one should get hated on because of their body image/weight etc. Also, something that really irks me is that people seem to forget there's a flipside to this debate. I'm sure it's been mentioned, but when someone calls someone out on being overweight it's rude and disgusting, but if someone is targeted because they're small it's not a big deal.

 

I've seen so many Facebook status about how "Only dogs go for bones, real men like curves", and that "Size 0 girls should seriously eat hamburgers". I don't think that's acceptable either. I'm pretty petite and I get called small/tiny/thin all the time. Granted, it doesn't really bother me or anything, but if people walked around calling those who are larger "big" or "large" that would be considered rude.

 

I don't know if that makes sense or anything. But I think people should just be healthy.

We've had quite a bit of discussion about that a couple pages back. :) Everyone seems to be in agreement- hating on people for their looks is just kind of not cool.

Though, just saying, that saying the people should just be healthy is still passing judgement on people. You can't know the state of someone's health unless they tell you- just because someone is fat or extremely slender doesn't mean that they are unhealthy (nor, on the flipside, that average people are healthy). I went on a bit of a rant about that just above, heh.

[complicatedwishes]

Ooooh I'm glad I've found this.

 

My nieces, both around the age of 10, are OBSESSED with their body image. It's actually scary, even I wasn't like that at such a young age.

 

They came to visit and on a few occasions they've run into the bathroom straight away and weigh themselves on our scales. One of them will say "yes! i've lost blahblahblah amount!!" and the other will say "yay i'm still the same weight!" and THEN as they are leaving to go home they run back in, weigh themselves and say similar things again!

 

Us adult family members have stepped in and said the usual like "you should love yourself for yourself, you are allowed treats it's just everything in moderation" and other nice things about how they are fine as they are.

 

I just think it's absolutely horrifying that girls, as young as 10, aren't enjoying their childhood because they are too busy worrying about how much they weigh. :sad01_anim:

[Rebecca~]

Ooooh I'm glad I've found this.

 

My nieces, both around the age of 10, are OBSESSED with their body image. It's actually scary, even I wasn't like that at such a young age.

 

They came to visit and on a few occasions they've run into the bathroom straight away and weigh themselves on our scales. One of them will say "yes! i've lost blahblahblah amount!!" and the other will say "yay i'm still the same weight!" and THEN as they are leaving to go home they run back in, weigh themselves and say similar things again!

 

Us adult family members have stepped in and said the usual like "you should love yourself for yourself, you are allowed treats it's just everything in moderation" and other nice things about how they are fine as they are.

 

I just think it's absolutely horrifying that girls, as young as 10, aren't enjoying their childhood because they are too busy worrying about how much they weigh. :sad01_anim:

Those poor girls. :(

I read some statistics about how girls as young as six or seven now are worrying about being fat, and wanting to go on diets. It's pretty horrifying.

[cornstar]

As long as a person is healthy, they shouldn't be insulted- but if someone is NOT healthy (ie, fat?) you can insult them all you want. Is that what you're saying?

 

People don't have an obligation to be healthy- that is also what I am saying. There are lots of people who can't AFFORD to be healthy. When you are barely making enough to feed your family at all, you can't say that you aren't going to eat processed foods, or eliminate foods with HFCS, etc. These foods are the cheapest, and it's better to be fed than to be hungry but eat unprocessed foods.

I recently went shopping for pasta sauce. I read the labels on every single brand, and only ONE did not have added sugar or HFCS. It cost more than twice as much for a smaller bottle than some of the other ones. I am priviledged enough to be able to afford that, but so many can't. You think it's all right to insult them?

HFCS is in everything now- the production of it has gone up 1100% in the past 10 years. Unless you have money to buy unprocessed foods, and the time to go looking for foods that don't have HFCS, it's practically impossible to eliminate it from your diet.

 

And really, when it comes down to it, someone doesn't have to be healthy. It is to their detriment over time, yes, but they have no obligation to be healthy. And you can never tell if someone is healthy or not by looking at them.

People are fat for so many reasons. Gland problems, not having money, being depressed, or being disabled, etc, etc, etc. Some fat people are incredible fit and active, but people don't believe them.

 

I really want to explain this properly. Regardless of someone being fit or healthy or not, people never, ever deserve to be insulted for who they are. They don't deserve ugly looks. They don't deserve to have people look at them and think "what a lazy slob", or "if only s/he got off their lazy butt", or "why aren't they eating a salad?", etc. People should be accepted for who they are, always, regardless of their health.

 

Insult someone for being unhealthy or by the way they look? Definitely not, of course people choose their own lifestyle whether it be the food they eat, religion they practice or what not. I am not going to assume what people's health are based on what they look. But I am not going to condone a person (I care about) to destroy their body with hazardous food, drug, or anything that is not beneficial.

[sarahesque]

I personally go to a university that doesn't promote the best body images for girls. And the sad thing is, a lot of these girls DO have pretty healthy lifestyles - they exercise regularly, and (when) they eat, they eat healthily. But two of my best friends have recently been suffering from bulimia because they still think it's not enough. One decided to stop, not because she realized her actions were detrimental, not because she decided she did like her body, but because she's been having issues with one of her teeth, and in a recent trip to the dentist, they told her she would need a root canal if the state of the tooth worsened. From my perspective, both of these girls are incredibly beautiful young women. It's horribly sad to me that they can't see this for themselves.

 

I don't think we have any right to insult people who are living unhealthy lifestyles. But to offer constructive criticism and support? I think that's perfectly acceptable; you just have to be careful to keep their emotions in consideration.

[bodysnatched]

Unfortunately, the state of the Western society's standards are horrific. Every year, there are more and more devastating facts about obesity rates in children, but the fact that so many young people have eating disorders is frightening. If you are interested, here is a chart outlining the influences on obese people in society.

 

I wish there was a quick fix, but there isn't. I have several issues here that I want to bring up!

 

1. Body weight is not necessarily a reflection on that individual's health status.

Let's face these facts now: being extremely overweight or extremely underweight is unhealthy. Being an extreme weight, on either end of the spectrum, may not cause a person problems in the present. However, problems in the future can be expected. Throwing out the idea of a remarkably fast metabolism, height, genes, etc., being extremely underweight is typically caused by dietary deficiencies. When people are lacking in crucial vitamins, their bodily functions become more and more difficult to complete. Excessive amounts of fat on the body causes the regular body functions to become more difficult to preform. The similarities are quite obvious!

If you want a clear example of this, tune in to an episode of Supersize vs. Superskinny. Dozens of episodes are available online, and the whole point of the show is very enlightening and gives you a very clear idea of how a poor diet effects both excessively overweight and underweight people.

 

2. Eating healthy doesn't have to be expensive.

It does, however, require a little bit of research and brain power. It is simple to demand an unhealthy person to eat healthy, but it is quite expensive! This tends to lead a person into a habit of fast food, which only makes their situation worse. But is fast food really less expensive? I beg you to please think about and review this photo, which outlines the cost of a fast food meal vs. 2 healthy meal options. Doing a little bit of research just by googling "how to feed a family on a budget" or "cheap healthy meals" should bring about a variety of websites with helpful information.

 

3. Being helpful is far more effective than being hurtfully critical.

People do not fall into poor eating habits overnight! Some people are born into a family of fast-food and unhealthy home-cooking. Some people fall into states of depression and comfort eat-- or stray from eating altogether. If you are legitimately concerned for a loved one's weight, do not be critical unless you are being constructive. They may not want to hear what you are saying at first, but if you have a clear point, it will resonate with them. Make sure that they know you are there to help educate and support them. Unhealthy people are typically not blithely unaware of the fact that they are unhealthy! Having someone to turn to is very helpful.

 

4. You never know what people are going through.

I have heard many times throughout my life to not judge a book by its cover. Sadly, this is almost impossible, but it is a very viable piece of advice. There are many types of eating disorders that cause health problems all the way from obesity to esophagus tears. Tons of research has been done recently in this area, and when someone thinks they have an eating disorder, it needs to be looked into. There are oftentimes layers of genuine reasons regarding why a person weighs a certain amount, why they have certain health issues, etc.

 

 

As a child, I was always slightly larger than everyone else. This had no effects on my social life, friends, etc. Luckily, I was never bullied outside of a few taunts that barely even resonate with me today. It may not have been a huge issue then, but as I got older, I realized that I was different, though I was treated in a normal manner. As I reached my teenage years, I considered my thighs monstrous, my stomach humongous, and my arms far too jiggly. I was leading a very unhealthy dietary lifestyle that consisted of eating junk and hardly coming close to meeting the minimum suggested exercise requirements.

 

At that time, I had an eating disorder called binge-eating disorder, something that I only recognize in myself now. Previously, I was too young and uneducated to notice that I qualified for an eating disorder. Instead of taking the "change in lifestyle" approach, I decided to just purge up the excessive amounts I was eating. I lost 20 pounds that summer, and many people were giving me compliments. After a few months, the weight loss slowed down, and I was absolutely sick of being, well, sick. At that point, I had teetered between eating copious amounts and puking, but I would eat normal meals between these episodes. It was not uncommon for me to binge and purge upwards of 5 or 6 times per day. Sometimes, I ate nothing. A few of my old food diaries show me eating less than 300-500 calories per day and exercising off what I did eat. Needless to say, my weight was like a rollercoaster.

 

I hated living this way, so I tearfully addressed my mother about my issues with purging, and she was stunned. She thought I was beautiful, smart, and I think refused to believe that I ever could have a problem of this magnitude. She told me that she would see me to a nutritionist, but she never got around to it. I actually remember her saying that many girls go through a "stage" of poor eating habits and self-obsession with their bodies. Now, it makes me so angry to think that I let her undermine my clear signs of a serious eating disorder in that way.

 

For months, I didn't purge as a promise to my mother. I was occasionally binge eating huge amounts of food, and other times, I would eat very little. My weight went back up to my highest, and I was angry with myself for telling her. I started to purge every tiny morsel of food that I consumed. I refused to eat out because purging was too difficult to accomplish. Being in a situation where I couldn't purge caused a horrible rush of fear and extreme anxiety about what I would do with all that food simply rotting inside me. To this day, I have this eating pattern of eating and purging. I look at my body in absolute disgust and hatred.

 

To round out this very long and personal post, I want to say that I admire all of you who care about the health and well-being of the people around you! In addition, it is always good to take very good care of yourself and make sure you are eating well, exercising, but most importantly, have a healthy respect and love for your body and mind. Someday, I hope to be where a lot of you are today! :laughingsmiley:

 

Also-- if any of you want to discuss any of the points I brought up, please do so! I was trying to be very brief and concise, but I fear I might have left out some vital information.

 

Very interesting thread that hits close to my personal interests!!

[LizyMarie]

Jumping in late on this conversation but: I am aparently a normal size gal. 38B-35-40 at 5'7". Lots of freckles, blue eyes, button nose. But what sets me appart? I was abused and used for two years from 14 - 16 and had a baby boy. As a female, I am sure some of you would get what I am about to say.

Having a child, especially at younger ages, can destroy your self image. I constantly think about what I would look like if I never went through it. Even though people tell me how good I look, I know they are lieing. Or at least I think they are. Cloths on I'm okay. When they are off, I'm not happy at all. I usually can't shop for clothing effectively. I even went to Target the other day, noticed the fat accumilating on my back and stomache and didn't even procede to try anything on. I walked out and went home and started bawling.

I'm not the only one. I know for a fact a good portion of today's society is dealing with horrible body images. Even if they haven't gone through what I have.

 

What really sucks is how much I tend to hate every person I see that's smaller than I am. I'm not heavy, but I'm wide in the hips. From the side I look skinny, face on I look heavy. It's odd. But it's enough to set me apart, because I know I look like an actual 'women' (the word here being used to describe the general mothers over the ages who look like they are wise in their age and experience).

 

Last November going into this January.. I had a bad expereince. I've had some like it but this one was worse..

I ended up getting completely sick and vomiting constantly. Just becauase I was so completely sad and getting worse. I wasn't eating for about a couple weeks, all I did was lay in bed and sleep. I lost about 15 pounds, and i was in and out of the ER because I didn't understand what was happening. I was put on different meds.. 14 different types of medications to help me through it (Yes, I counted when it was all over).

I had tons of exams and doctors and diagnosis in the end. I couldn't keep an appitite, and I found food to be compeltely foreign.

 

Now, 4 months after everything ended, I'm back on solid ground but not completely okay. I'm still upset with how I look, and completely repulsed by how I feel (physically feeling my own body. I wear layers of clothing if you can't tell). I was put on certain meds that helped me eat again, it was a horribly long process. But I've gained weight and I'm back up to 185 lbs. (Though I still have the same measurements and generally, I haven't changed much at all...)

 

I hate body image. I'm sick of feeling okay with how I look and enjoying how completely average I am, and on the flip side hating all females that are skinnier than me because I feel so ugly and fat.

 

I don't even know what else to say at this point. Le sigh :/

 

Oh, the best part: I know so much about biology that I understand how to eat and what to eat, how the body breaks down foods, the ratios of carbs and transfats and such per day to burn, ect. I even know it's healthy to eat at least 4 small meals a day, keep cardio workouts, NEVER GO ON DIETS, and just keep life stress free. And I don't even eat high fat, trans fats, or lots of junk food. I don't even like pop! (soda) I drink milk, water juice, and love my fruits, veggies, and lots of chicken and turkey and the occasional sausage. And I love oatmeal and oat cerals and such. Holy. Crap. I. Hate. Popular. Culture!

And yet popular culture has still brought me down to where I am now. GAH~!

[Rebecca~]

Jumping in late on this conversation but: I am aparently a normal size gal. 38B-35-40 at 5'7". Lots of freckles, blue eyes, button nose. But what sets me appart? I was abused and used for two years from 14 - 16 and had a baby boy. As a female, I am sure some of you would get what I am about to say.

Having a child, especially at younger ages, can destroy your self image. I constantly think about what I would look like if I never went through it. Even though people tell me how good I look, I know they are lieing. Or at least I think they are. Cloths on I'm okay. When they are off, I'm not happy at all. I usually can't shop for clothing effectively. I even went to Target the other day, noticed the fat accumilating on my back and stomache and didn't even procede to try anything on. I walked out and went home and started bawling.

I'm not the only one. I know for a fact a good portion of today's society is dealing with horrible body images. Even if they haven't gone through what I have.

 

What really sucks is how much I tend to hate every person I see that's smaller than I am. I'm not heavy, but I'm wide in the hips. From the side I look skinny, face on I look heavy. It's odd. But it's enough to set me apart, because I know I look like an actual 'women' (the word here being used to describe the general mothers over the ages who look like they are wise in their age and experience).

 

Last November going into this January.. I had a bad expereince. I've had some like it but this one was worse..

I ended up getting completely sick and vomiting constantly. Just becauase I was so completely sad and getting worse. I wasn't eating for about a couple weeks, all I did was lay in bed and sleep. I lost about 15 pounds, and i was in and out of the ER because I didn't understand what was happening. I was put on different meds.. 14 different types of medications to help me through it (Yes, I counted when it was all over).

I had tons of exams and doctors and diagnosis in the end. I couldn't keep an appitite, and I found food to be compeltely foreign.

 

Now, 4 months after everything ended, I'm back on solid ground but not completely okay. I'm still upset with how I look, and completely repulsed by how I feel (physically feeling my own body. I wear layers of clothing if you can't tell). I was put on certain meds that helped me eat again, it was a horribly long process. But I've gained weight and I'm back up to 185 lbs. (Though I still have the same measurements and generally, I haven't changed much at all...)

 

I hate body image. I'm sick of feeling okay with how I look and enjoying how completely average I am, and on the flip side hating all females that are skinnier than me because I feel so ugly and fat.

 

I don't even know what else to say at this point. Le sigh :/

 

Oh, the best part: I know so much about biology that I understand how to eat and what to eat, how the body breaks down foods, the ratios of carbs and transfats and such per day to burn, ect. I even know it's healthy to eat at least 4 small meals a day, keep cardio workouts, NEVER GO ON DIETS, and just keep life stress free. And I don't even eat high fat, trans fats, or lots of junk food. I don't even like pop! (soda) I drink milk, water juice, and love my fruits, veggies, and lots of chicken and turkey and the occasional sausage. And I love oatmeal and oat cerals and such. Holy. Crap. I. Hate. Popular. Culture!

And yet popular culture has still brought me down to where I am now. GAH~!

I'm so sorry for what has happened to you. :(

 

[Finn the Human]

I do not really like people who are obsessed of weight. Just dont care about your outside but your inside.

[Rebecca~]

I do not really like people who are obsessed of weight. Just dont care about your outside but your inside.

That's easier said than done. We live in a culture that tells us that it's our outside that is way more important than what is on the inside. We have had this message sinking into our brains our entire lives. It's more than a little difficult to turn that message off, and reaslise it to be the crap that it is.

I am an activist for body positivity, but I have trouble always ignoring our cultural messages.

[AngelBones]

To be honest, society has done horrors to the way people see themselves and I don't think this effect can ever be reversed. For example, I'm around 5'7, and I weigh 160 pounds. I'm only 16, and although my figure is decent I consider myself over weight. Now I say 'decent' with a struggle. I think that I have way too much fat especially around my tummy, and my thighs. Now all my friends try and be supportive and tell me that I'm not over weight, but I just don't believe them.

 

Because i know that I would much rather be anorexic than obese. And no matter how much I'd try, my mindset will never change. Because of how people are portrayed on TV, in movies, and everywhere else imaginable, because I don't have a completely flat stomach, I'm just not good enough. And I see plenty of girls that are too thin around school. But no matter what all my mates say, I still find that more attractive than what I am now.

 

So really, even if society tries it's hardest to restore people to a healthy mindset, everyone will still be wishing to be average. Only average doesn't mean healthy anymore, it means skinny.

[Zombiiesque]

Oh gosh, there's so much to say about this topic. I have a cousin who was very tall and very thin for years, up until she had a child. She was a size zero just naturally, and she's about 5'10. She ate normal meals, though - she tried to gain weight and nothing she did worked. Now she's at what she considers a more normal weight for herself and she's so happy, and it all had to do with not losing weight after having a baby.

Myself on the other hand, I'm short and have been always struggling with my weight since I was a teenager. Most of the girls I went to high school with were 110 and under, usually between the 105 and 100 mark. I weighed anywhere between 115 and 120. I know I wasn't fat - I can see that from my photos now - I mean, I have a large frame and I come from a family of large boned, short people. I guess back then I was too busy comparing myself to the other girls my age. It didn't help that I have a horrible self image stemming from abuse - you get told you're ugly for so long and it's hard to believe you might be pretty, you know?

I saw back in the thread that someone was talking about mental health and physical health. I think they are tied so closely together.

These days, I'm pretty steady at a size 14, and I would like to drop a few more pounds and be down between a 10 and a 12. I eat pretty healthy - I really don't overeat except when I get my monthly and then I have the munchies for the first two days. Even then it's not excessive. I don't exercise a lot but I do a lot of physical labor on my job, and a lot of walking. I'm pretty evenly built all over, I don't have a small waist and never have even when I was a lot smaller, but I do have a lot of muscle on my body which I think helps to affect my clothing size. I still have a terrible self image, though. *sigh* I don't know how to get around it.

I hate to see people harassed no matter whether they're skinny or large - it's not fair and it hurts.

You know, before I met my husband, he weighed in at just over 300 pounds. He was diagnosed with hypothyroidism, and they put him on medicine. Then, his first wife left him. The combination of the two things - depression and the medical condition diagnosed - caused him to drop below 200 pounds. He now ranges around 190-200, and he still sees himself as fat. He's 6 feet tall! He hasn't been overweight in many, many years.

Anyway, I'm all over the place with this - but so many of the things I read in this topic really touched me.

[LizyMarie]

That's easier said than done. We live in a culture that tells us that it's our outside that is way more important than what is on the inside. We have had this message sinking into our brains our entire lives. It's more than a little difficult to turn that message off, and reaslise it to be the crap that it is.

I am an activist for body positivity, but I have trouble always ignoring our cultural messages.

 

Not only is it easier said than done, but not everyone takes into effect that muscle weighs more than fat. I personally have so much muscle in my legs that I look to be about 150 lbs but am really 180. So when someone like me gets on the scale, we are forever disheartened by the number that haunts us.

[Rebecca~]

Not only is it easier said than done, but not everyone takes into effect that muscle weighs more than fat. I personally have so much muscle in my legs that I look to be about 150 lbs but am really 180. So when someone like me gets on the scale, we are forever disheartened by the number that haunts us.

Very true! Things like that are also why BMI is a terrible indicator of someone's health. It doesn't take bone density, or muscle into account. I normally look like I weigh 15-25 pounds less than I actually do, and that usually has to do with my being muscular, like you, and being very large boned.

 

I don't know if it helps, but if normal scales upset you, but you want to keep track, maybe you should try a body fat scale. It reads your body, seperating the fat from the muscle and bone, so you can get a more accurate reading. I'm not saying you should, since I know scales of any kind can be really upsetting for people, and kind of triggering, but if I had to use a scale, I would use one of those- at least it's not some arbitrary number that says virtually nothing about the actual state of your body.