Naamah D. Posted August 23, 2014 Share Posted August 23, 2014 I used to write a lot of poetry, but rushed through it and most of the time they were about subjects that I have no interest in. Now that I've developed personal interest, I was able to come up with poems that actually make sense. I have two so far that I'm really happy with. Here it goes! "Nameless" I feel like a crime scene that's left in the dark Alone until I'm found As I decompose I become nobody I'm sad, alone and without a name Nobody cared enough to confess Nobody cared enough to make me a lost and found When they draw my picture I hope for the best When I'm talked about on the news nobody can piece together the rest Sooner or later they give me a name Like I am someone's baby girl once again While it's not my real name it'll have to do Until my case is closed and the autopsy wishes come true If you can tell me what "Nameless" is about, I will love you forever and ever <3 My next poem is about my nature as a human being. "Role-Play" I sit around and wait all day For someone to make happy to come my way A lifestyle wanting someone's pride Has killed me for it has been a disappointing ride All I do is put on a mask Because I want to complete their every task If they don't like what they see I make a slave out of myself that will never be free Tired of this role-play I am Every move I make makes water flood the dam Like a puppy or her back legs I beg for a treat But every failed trick results in the feeling of defeat If I didn't make them feel satisfied and smile I'm done saying I'm sorry and I'm done for awhile Duskitty 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Naamah D. Posted August 23, 2014 Author Share Posted August 23, 2014 i wish i could vote for both of the poems. *claps. will save this thread so i can read again and again, later. Thank you very much :) Writing is a huge part of my life. The only thing is I'm a huge perfectionist. "Role-play" is about being a perfectionist and trying to please other people and how it ends up backfiring. I write a novel series and my own cartoon as well. Thank you so much. <3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
_ma_cris Posted August 23, 2014 Share Posted August 23, 2014 Hey Naamah, your poems are great. Nameless make me think of Orphans, or Pets in the Pound if you want to keep it NeoRelated... Maybe that's not what you were thinking about when you wrote, but I love it anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duskitty Posted August 23, 2014 Share Posted August 23, 2014 I really like them both :D I'm thinking "Nameless" is about someone who was murdered, or someone who committed suicide...? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nousha Posted August 24, 2014 Share Posted August 24, 2014 I like "Nameless" more. English is not my native language so my opinion is not very valuable but still I like the rhythm more and I definitely prefer its rhymes and the lack of them in the beginning to the second one's where they are a bit too intrusive. Go on with writing, I'd like to read some more :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lizzyjane101 Posted August 27, 2014 Share Posted August 27, 2014 Nameless sounds like unrequited love/ being alone to me, but perhaps it's like those inkblot tests where you see what you know. Your poems are lovely. I never really thought of sharing my work online before; maybe I'll do it :P You've inspired me :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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