Separation Anxiety

[nightfall8705]

Tomorrow, my apartment is due for an annual inspection (the BIG one) and I'm not buggin' over it in particular, but one of the biggest things I hate about this place is their no pet policy. Besides the fact that half the people who live here secretly have them anyway is irrevelant. If I could afford to move, I certainly would, but the thing is, I've been extremely clinically depressed for 15 years. I've had highs and lows, but one thing that has really kept me together is companionship, and for the last one and a half years, my constant companion and best friend Sydney, has truly been a blessing and miracle in my life.

 

We hardly ever get separated, except for inspections when she stays over at a friend's house for the night. If the apartment boss was to find her, they would take her away from me. They took a pet from me several years ago and it was tramatic, and I never even got to say goodbye. Anyway, Sydney and I have only been separated a few times, but the last time we were separated, it was for over 3 weeks, and I only got to see her once in that entire time. I was miserable, and my friend would send me pics of Syd to cheer me up, but the pics were always of her staring out the window and her little fuzzy face looked so sad. She actually lost 2 pounds because she refused to eat normally. She doesn't really care for the other cats at my friend's house (even though 3 of the 6 are blood related to her).

 

She had to be put in a kennel that time we were separated for those 3 weeks. She hissed and growled and meowed the word "NO!" clear as day. Believe me, Sydney knows more words than that and she's smarter than most people I know. When I say the word "inspection" and "Aunt Rat's house" (my friend's nickname) Sydney gets really upset.

 

Anyway, long story short, I'm dreading spending tonight and most of tomorrow without Sydney (and my brother's cat Sherbert) until Wednesday night.

 

I'm hoping that after all the housework gets finished, I can distract myself on Neo for a while. Do any of you have pets that are super attached to you? How do you deal with the separation anxiety? Thanks for reading, and for any comments. Sorry this post is so long and boring.

 

There's some horrible quality photos (heh!) of my fuzzy loves on Sandrea's pet page. My Sydney Bear is at the bottom. I love her so much! <3

 

http://www.neopets.com/~Sanguine_Dream

[nousha]

Oh, dear, that's so sad :( Sidney is just lovely, beatiful cat! I never understand why people ban pets from certain buildings, especially cats...

I have two dogs and two cats and I know how difficult is to go somewhere without them. When I travel I try to take them but sometimes it's not possible so I leave them at pet's hotels. I know there they've been taken care of, but still I feel very sad, anxious and fearful. I always worry they will be heartbroken, thinking I'm leaving them...

 

I'm sending all my support to you and lovely Sidney, hope the separation will be short. You seem like a wonderful owner and I'm sure Sidney understands, althouth that doesn't stop her from being sad. Be brave! Hugs from half across the world (:

[.Brianna.]

That's so sad that they could take her away from you. :( Being away from pets is so hard. When I was in college I hated leaving my cat...every time I came home on break he would hold a grudge and wouldn't come around me for a couple days. Now with our kittens we try to take them along for the ride if we are just going somewhere for the weekend. We haven't taken a long trip since we got them but I'm sure I will be upset to leave them when we do.

[chelperk]

Waaaah, no! I can't believe they just took your cat before. Your Syd looks just like my old cat Puff. She ran away because my apt had a janky lock and she just took off. Once, I visited my friend's complex and there was a cat there that looked just like her but it must have been one of her offspring [she wasn't fixed]. Hang in there! You'll be reunited with your fur baby soon.

[Shelley]

I couldn't imagine having my pets taken away :( I love my two cats. In fact whenever I'm in the house I have one of them on my lap or following me around at all times. They definitely help with my anxiety and depression so I know how you feel. But I'm glad I don't have to live with the fear of having them taken away, I think that would just give me more anxiety! I had a friend who had a lizard at college. They did a very good job of keeping it hidden, but one day they did get caught. Thankfully they were able to safely bring it back home.I wish the best of luck to you, I'm sure everything will work out, :)

[JinxDiamandis]

Oh my, this is so sad :( I really want to give you a hug right now <3

[96037]

If you are clinically diagnosed with depression then you should request a letter or waiver from you doctor or psychologist for a social service animal. I have BiPolar and Aspergers, and that is how I have my cat. This, under law, prevents ANY landlord from discriminating or denying you your cat under the understanding that it is required for you better health. Just give them a copy of letter. And also, with the letter they cannot legally charge you a deposit on the animal, though you would be responsible for any damage cause by a SSA. (not that I am saying she has) Hope this helps! I love being able to cut corners. :) and this is federal law by the way, not state.

 

SSA's do have quite a few differences from a normal service animal. This is basically the only right they have, you can't bring them in a store, BUT you CAn bring them on an airplane or any public transit to help with anxiety, etc. you just gotta keep a copy of your letter dated within the past three years I think it is?

[Novelista]

I can't imagine living without my Lauren. I took off for Vegas when she was a kitten and my dad was still around to take care of her; but even now, I think, "I adopted her in July and went on vacation in October? What kind of a mother am I?!" :P It's kind of funny when I'm gone a bit, though...she's been known to meow into the phone! (Of course, that's exactly the sort of thing you want to happen when you're being treated for depression, nu?)

 

This may not be the right time to say this, but some breeds actually get depressed and mope if you leave them too long--the Abyssinian is one of them. My dad's little girl, Ani, is Aby/tabby and I honestly believe that if she didn't have the two of us (and Lauren), she wouldn't be very happy. I cringe to think of what will happen when I can finally move out!

[nightfall8705]

Thanks everyone for your love and support. All of your pets sound lovely! I'd like everybody's post if I hadn't already reached todays positive quota, lol. I already tried to get a doctor's note but it's been an annoying cycle between them and the landlord getting a letter. So far, I've kept the kitties hidden and some people know about them, but were gracious to keep the secret. Actually, Sydney's vet's assistant has a pet and she lives here at the complex. She says she has to take her pet to work during inspections to keep them from taking her cat away.

 

My friend just came and got Sydney and Sherbert to take to her house. Sydney was meowing and anxious. She didn't want to go, but I told her it was only for a night and gave her some of her favorite kitty treats. I'm not sure if Maine Coons are prone to anxiety, but I can't stand it when she gets so sad, bless her heart. I think she'll be okay. She is in good hands at my friend's house. I miss her already though. I hope the day just flies by. :)

 

You guys are the best. I appreciate all of your posts! <3

[96037]

Your doctors do not have to send it on their own by what I understand. I think you can get your own copies and give it to them yourselves. I hope you are able to find a good solution soon. :)

[dawnshine]

I spent a few months away from my dogs when I was in LA and I was bummed about it, but since they roam the countryside and love their free lifestyle I could never take them from here. I remember growing up in cities as a child though, especially in military housing units, and they were very strict about the no pets rule. I still convinced my parents to let me sneak a couple cats in and I always felt very bad having to keep them hidden. They couldn't sit in the windows and sun themselves and look out at the world like other cats, and I couldn't take them outside to get fresh air. I really didn't like having to live that way, and I feel it diminished the life of my cats, too. Luckily they outlived having to be housed in that situation, and ended up getting to live out AWESOME semi-outdoor lives. They could come and go in and out as they pleased.

 

Being separated from my canine companions is always a bummer. But they are so independent that even though they miss me a lot they still live happily. I hear my dog Philippe gets separation anxiety from me a bit, though, although it still isn't worth it to take her from her awesome life here when I venture.

 

I agree with above posts, you should really try to get that doctor's note. Even if it's a pain, if you really hound and try for it, it will make it worth it in the long run. Without it you are putting you and your kitties future together in jeopardy, and it's not worth having to go through the trauma, separation, and anxiety you have to go through currently just to live a normal life with your fur babe.

[CrazyBiscuit]

That's such a sad situation to be in and my heart goes out to you and your dear kitties. :( I would be distraught if anyone took my pet away, or even just the thought of it maybe happening. I am glad that others around you are understanding but if the doctor's note would help I would echo what other people have said and try to get that in motion. It will be one less thing for you to feel anxious about in the future. Until then, I hope it all goes well for you and you get to be back with your companions again very soon.

[Nubisbully]

I had this problem in college as well. I had a dx of major depressive disorder that was changed to bipolar and not having any pets in college was torture. I ended up getting a rat and hiding her in my closet for inspections.

 

Now I have three kitties and three dogs, just lost my rat and my parents have my lizard and other furry babies.

 

Two of my dogs are "restricted" breeds (pit mix and rottie) so housing is amazingly hard to come by regardless. I've looked into the therapy pet loopholes and unfortunately they're not always easy. Some states are easier than others, especially with good local help and a good doctor whose willing to fight for you. Southern states can be especially cruel though (lived in NC,SC,FL) and it doesn't guarantee that you can keep your apartment (they can always find other "legal" means but they'd have to be pretty heartless, which is sounds like they are with past experience.)

 

Good luck, I'm rooting for you big time. Let us know how it turns out, you'll get your lil one back in no time. I miss my own Sydney tons. Yours looks like a Maine Coon mix, so sweet. :)

[nightfall8705]

Thanks again everyone! Inspections happened on Wednesday. It is now Friday and inspections are officially over. Sydney and Sherbert are now back home happy and enjoying their Friday treat. I'm just glad to have them back home. <3

[Rune Valentine]

I know this is late, and as I'm not familiar with US laws, it might be worth looking over and see if you can register your cat as an emotional support animal, which may allow you to keep your pets even under no-pet housing. :) I know how important pets are in our lives, and sometimes they're all we have and it's hard to be away from them - this might help you with not having to face that problem again.