TheNeonHyena

Ahhh, the dreaded Thanksgiving... My least favorite season. Every year around this time family members that do not speak to one another for the eleven months preceding it converge upon one unlucky household and pretend that we have any kind of interest in each other's lives. Frankly I ask to work every year because I find the whole thing disgusting and I'll gladly take time and a half holiday pay so someone else can go be with their family. Plus, if you're in America you can't mention the T word without bringing up its oh so wonderful companion, Black Friday. Shoppers love it, traditionalists and retail employees absolutely loathe it. That's the biggest hypocrisy to me... Sitting at a table one minute being "thankful" for all you have and then duking it out over discount bath towels (I have seen an elderly woman get into a fist fight over these... I wish I was kidding.) the next moment. I don't really celebrate it, but I usually get guilt tripped into either hosting dinner or helping cook. Plus, any chance I get to see my grandmother is a chance I take.
 
On a note about the hypocrisy of Thanksgiving in reference to the Native peoples of the USA, I live in the Cherokee nation in Oklahoma (no I've not got an ounce of native blood that I'm aware of, pure Scandinavian and European heritage here, I just live in their borders.) I can't speak of the rest of the Natives living in America but here they have it GOLDEN. Having a tribal card opens up a boatload of opportunities for them, everything from free housing to job preference to scholarships. Heck, I know a kid that gets paid a thousand dollars a month just to keep his gradepoint average above a 3.25. I'm sure there are a lot of people that still very much hold a grudge against white people, but most of them around here have pretty much moved on in life. They've got a good thing going making literal millions of dollars off dumb white people every year at their thousands of casinos dotting the landscape(and their turnpike) and here they actually distribute it out among the tribe pretty well. That in absolutely no way excuses all the horrible things their ancestors endured, but nearly all of them realize that the white people currently living and going about their day did not in fact subject them to any of it and should not be held accountable for the sins of people they never met. Most people around here, regardless of color, celebrate Gorge Yourself on Turkey and Pretend You Like Socializing With Your Family Day.

Well, I've got a mixed opinion on this. Some avatars, like certain events and things you had to log on every day to do challenges to get.. I think those should stay retired... however some of the ones that are unattainable I feel like could be rereleased in a different format perhaps. Change the colors slightly, state that they're a "second edition" or something. That way people could get the avatar they really want, but it would still be special to have the originals.

For the last six years I've been ringing in the new year at home either drinking and playing video games with a friend or simply watching a movie. This year one of our friends is DJing a new year's party at a bar/hotel. In addition to paying her they're giving her a free private cabin to stay in and a tab at the bar... so I have a feeling I'll be the only one remembering new years since I don't drink.

Well it's an emotionally rough area, sugar. What are you wanting to gain from the confrontation? Are you seeking answers to "Why did you let this happen?" or are you just needing the closure that might come with it? I wouldn't call them your mom and dad. They just happen to be the people that popped you out into this world. The people that raised you, took care of you, fed you, clothed you, cared for you when you were ill, and in general loved you, those are your parents. My adopted sister also was removed from her biological parents because of abuse, and at 26 she opted to meet her birth mother. It was a very emotionally trying time for her, but her mother was no longer the woman that had abused and abandoned her. She had gotten help and changed, quit using drugs, gotten a college education and was in a stable career. There's a possibility that could happen for you and there might be a chance of rekindling some sort of relationship. If you're just looking to meet them because you're angry with the past, it might not be as cathartic as you hope. All that pent up anger often seems misdirected when you finally confront them years later, especially if the person has changed their ways.
 
I would speak to a psychiatrist about this to explore the reasons why, that way you won't make a decision that ends up being more emotionally damaging to you. It might also be a good idea to see if your can get information about your biological mother BEFORE you truly decide if you want to meet her. Talk to a social worker to see what your options are.
 
Edit: You are NOT being a big whiny baby. This is of importance to you.

Oh, thank you much. *oblivious as usual* I didn't even think to check the news post.
 
Or check the GLOWING BLUE LETTERS under the darn thing... *facepalm* Thanks

Well it's an emotionally rough area, sugar. What are you wanting to gain from the confrontation? Are you seeking answers to "Why did you let this happen?" or are you just needing the closure that might come with it? I wouldn't call them your mom and dad. They just happen to be the people that popped you out into this world. The people that raised you, took care of you, fed you, clothed you, cared for you when you were ill, and in general loved you, those are your parents. My adopted sister also was removed from her biological parents because of abuse, and at 26 she opted to meet her birth mother. It was a very emotionally trying time for her, but her mother was no longer the woman that had abused and abandoned her. She had gotten help and changed, quit using drugs, gotten a college education and was in a stable career. There's a possibility that could happen for you and there might be a chance of rekindling some sort of relationship. If you're just looking to meet them because you're angry with the past, it might not be as cathartic as you hope. All that pent up anger often seems misdirected when you finally confront them years later, especially if the person has changed their ways.
 
I would speak to a psychiatrist about this to explore the reasons why, that way you won't make a decision that ends up being more emotionally damaging to you. It might also be a good idea to see if your can get information about your biological mother BEFORE you truly decide if you want to meet her. Talk to a social worker to see what your options are.
 
Edit: You are NOT being a big whiny baby. This is of importance to you.

Well it's an emotionally rough area, sugar. What are you wanting to gain from the confrontation? Are you seeking answers to "Why did you let this happen?" or are you just needing the closure that might come with it? I wouldn't call them your mom and dad. They just happen to be the people that popped you out into this world. The people that raised you, took care of you, fed you, clothed you, cared for you when you were ill, and in general loved you, those are your parents. My adopted sister also was removed from her biological parents because of abuse, and at 26 she opted to meet her birth mother. It was a very emotionally trying time for her, but her mother was no longer the woman that had abused and abandoned her. She had gotten help and changed, quit using drugs, gotten a college education and was in a stable career. There's a possibility that could happen for you and there might be a chance of rekindling some sort of relationship. If you're just looking to meet them because you're angry with the past, it might not be as cathartic as you hope. All that pent up anger often seems misdirected when you finally confront them years later, especially if the person has changed their ways.
 
I would speak to a psychiatrist about this to explore the reasons why, that way you won't make a decision that ends up being more emotionally damaging to you. It might also be a good idea to see if your can get information about your biological mother BEFORE you truly decide if you want to meet her. Talk to a social worker to see what your options are.
 
Edit: You are NOT being a big whiny baby. This is of importance to you.

I don't think I need to reiterate the don't lose weight for other people and the make fitness goals not weight goals bits, seems like everyone on here are pretty awesome and were quick to support you in that.
 
What I will say is be careful. Trying to lose weight when you have a less than comfortable body image can be very emotionally trying. I very much suggest avoiding the scale and instead going for feeling healthy because sometimes those numbers start to rule our life. I've seen many a beautiful woman (or guy) hate his body to the point of self harm, including eating disorders, because when they tried losing weight it didn't always work for them. Remember that going slow and changing the lifestyle, not just your body, is not only the healthiest thing you can do right now, it might save your life in the future.
 
Always consult a doctor if making serious changes to your diet. Avoid fad diets, pills and empty promises from companies. I can echo everyone on dropping soda, which can be hard but trust me it can be done. If you drink energy drinks, you need to stop ASAP, they not only mess with your natural circadian rhythm but they jack up your metabolism and are loaded with kidney damaging ingredients.
 
And get a good pair of shoes!

If your goal is to lose weight/weigh a certain amount, you might get there, but it'll be hard to stay motivated to stay there -- and that goal might lead to different choices that might not make your body as healthy as it could be if your focus were on health.
 
So instead of using the scale as your motivation, make you your motivation. Please forgive me if I'm paraphrasing you incorrectly, but it sounds like you feel uncomfortable and less fit than you want to be right now. So set some fitness goals for yourself rather than weight loss goals. The weight loss will happen.
 
There are so many misconceptions regarding weight loss and health, and so much misinformation out there. Many types of diet and exercise combinations can cause you to lose muscle mass along with fat, slowing down your metabolism and increasing the chances that you regain the weight. They can also affect bone density, increasing your chances for osteoporosis later in life.
 
Here are some resources:
American College of Sports Medicine's fitness recommendations by type (The vast majority of adults don't meet these minimum recommendations; if you don't, you can slowly increase your exercise to try to meet the standards. Strength-training is vital when trying to lose body fat to make sure you're not losing lean muscle mass as well.) Using MFP is a good start, but I think you can adjust your macros there (% of daily calories from fat, carbs, and protein). The ratio can vary based on your activity level, insulin sensitivity, genetics, etc., so ask your doctor to recommend the best ratio for you. I took a couple of free nutrition classes at coursera. If you're really interested in healthy living, these can be a fun way to learn more. (You can obtain a certificate of completion if you do well enough, and the courses are from universities around the world.) Start with some small changes that will make you feel better. Work on those for a month, and then adjust. For example, if you currently do no exercise and aren't tracking what you eat, your goals for December might be:
Walk for 30 minutes in the mornings on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. Track what you're eating in MFP. (Just tracking can be a lot of work, and during this month, you can learn more about nutrition and spot any trends that might help you create goals for next month.) Eliminate/reduce 1 unhealthy habit (e.g., if you drink a liter of soda every day, replace it with sparkling, seltzer, or regular water except on Saturdays; or maybe you get fast food for lunch every day, and you could make it a goal to pack a lunch 1 -- or 3, if you're feeling ambitious -- times/week). Keep your goals specific (what are you going to do, when, where, how much, and how often?), measurable ("exercise more" isn't easily measurable, but "exercise 90 minutes a week" is), achievable (don't try to change all the things at once, or jump from no exercise to 2 hours a day), relevant, and time-based (schedule things like workouts or weekly meal shopping/prep, and keep those appointments like you would any other). As you progress on your journey, you can make more specific and/or time-bound goals such as "be able to do 50 push-ups at a time by March 1" or "add 40 pounds to my bench press in the month of January" or "lose 2 inches in my belly during January" or "be able to run 1 mile without stopping by March 1". Or on the nutrition side of things, for January, you could aim for "Eat at least 20g of protein per day" or "Eat 1 vegetable with breakfast and 2 with both lunch and dinner" or "Eat 1700-2000 calories per day." *
 
Take all advice with a grain of salt. Most importantly, figure out what you will enjoy! There are lots of ways to eat healthy and lots of ways to exercise. You're more likely to make this a lifelong change if you enjoy what you're doing. (I can only stand to track my meals for a few days at a time; I use it as an assessment tool to set goals to tweak my diet if it's gotten a bit out of whack -- mostly my goals are things like "eat more beans, bananas, X, Y, and Z to improve my potassium levels." But many people love to track stuff!) Try new things, and drop things that just aren't working for you.
 
Regarding attracting people to you, people tend to be attracted to positive people who have confidence and enjoy life. By focusing on your health doing things you find fun, your positivity, confidence, and enjoyment will all increase.
 
*Note: I pulled these examples out of my head. They are not meant to be actual recommendations for anyone to follow! I am not a fitness or nutrition professional!

Oh man, the hours of my life spent playing Dr. Mario and Pokemon Snap are probably a criminal amount... When I was young my oldest sister had a N64 and a Sega Dreamcast... I sure do miss those old games sometimes.

I've very many times considered obsessively trying to collect a million of a single kind of junk item... but I always end up just discarding it. Except omelets, which I guess aren't really junk since you can feed them to your pets, but I still collect them.

Currently I'm just trying to hit 2 million MP. I have been on forced hiatus for a while and usually don't get tons of time to play games or whatever. Pesky real life nonsense.
 
Mostly I'm aiming at avatars right now, and of course owning a ridiculous about of omelets...