Duskitty Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 Hi guys. So there's somebody who I have a crush on, even though I don't know them in person. I really want to tell them, but I'm afraid to because I can't even work up the courage and I'm scared they might reject me. Any advice? This topic has been edited by a member of staff (Zombiiesque). The topic was posted in the wrong area. Please check your user inbox to see if you have been contacted regarding this topic. Per the reason above, this topic has been MOVED from 'Debate Chat' to 'Your Life'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the_microwave Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 As someone who's been in that situation before, I vote for telling them. The best that can happen is that they like you too and it works out, and the worst that can happen is that they don't like you in the same way and things stay the same--maybe awkward for a bit, but not for long if they're a genuine friend. It never hurts to be honest. Rebecca~ 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ysera Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 Honestly for me, maybe not yet if you don't know them in person. Maybe grow closer first? So that they get to know you, too? And like, maybe feel it out first if they're sending signals that they may like you back. I'm not that brave expressing my feelings to someone who I may not talk to a lot, even if I try to find out everything I can about them (stalker, much?). Rejection is like a dark cloud hanging over me and I really prefer to let them know I like them through actions (teasing, flirting) over a span of time, and not merely come up and say what I feel. karmacow 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rebecca~ Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 I too have been there, though I knew my crush in person. I was terrified for months that I would be rejected, but I finally worked up the courage to do so, and now- almost a year and a half later- we're very much in love, and living together. I also vote for telling the person. Honesty is always the best policy. You can sometimes tell when someone likes you, and it just makes things awkward if you don't tell them. A good friend of mine told me that she had a crush on me. Things were a little awkward for a while, since I didn't reciprocate the feelings, but we worked through it. I love her dearly, but more like a sister than anything else. karmacow and Emily 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Emily Posted February 24, 2013 Share Posted February 24, 2013 Maybe it's just something that comes with getting older, but I don't see the point in dancing around issues. It just builds tension and makes you more nervous. If you have feelings for someone (and you're sure they're real), just tell them. If they feel the same way, awesome. If not, at least you put it out there. If you care enough about each other to be good friends, you can get over the rejection hump. You don't know unless you try. I've been in this situation before with a couple of my friends. One of those times we went out for a bit, the other time we didn't. In both cases, we're still friends now, and I even lived with the one I got rejected by as a roommate for a few years after I got over my feelings for him. It's true you really don't know someone until you live with them :P Additionally, if you don't know them in person, rejection would likely (not sure because I've never formed feelings like that for people other than in-person) be easier to deal with because you don't have to physically be around them. On the other hand, how well do you know this person? Sometimes, it's easy to confuse strong platonic feelings with romantic feelings. Rebecca~ and spazzy_child 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duskitty Posted February 24, 2013 Author Share Posted February 24, 2013 Wow thank you everybody! I think I will get to know them better before I tell them. Thanks Emily for mentioning the platonic-romantic feelings difference, I'm pretty confused about my feelings... :* It is someone on this forum... karmacow 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1_little_sweet_girl Posted September 17, 2013 Share Posted September 17, 2013 I have been in the same situation. It was hard to do, but I REALLY wanted him to know how I felt and I wanted to know how he felt. We went on a walk and I just straight up told him how he makes me feel. It feels SO good when you get it off your chest and that he knows. It may be a tad bit awkward, but I think it's way better to know how he feels, than to continue on and not know. Telling him will also help the relationship to move forward :) Good Luck!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MargaretaMcDaniel Posted September 28, 2013 Share Posted September 28, 2013 I was also in the same situation earlier. I think first of all you need to know a lot about that person, you both must have to trust each other , as what I feel about love is only the trust over a person. After that go and propose that person without hesitation because inability to spoke own feelings in front of our loved ones is more painful than getting rejected. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AJ11 Posted October 4, 2013 Share Posted October 4, 2013 The last person I had a really good friendship with I realised I was falling in love with them but I didnt say it to them because of our work situation. Then one day they said lets go for a walk and said they had to talk to me about something and I couldnt beleive it when they told me they had fallen for me too All these years on we are still best friends and in love and living together .. all very good get to know that person really well first, then drop a few hints here and there - maybe send a song with lyrics that hint etc if you get nothing negative back then decide if you want to tell them how you feel and go for it good luck Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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