Sweetdang Posted April 16, 2012 Posted April 16, 2012 Hello I liked that! And the simply-sad kind of shadow it cast, plus the fact it went back in a full circle. Very nice. :) I do take quibbles with the fact that it's a rhyming poem, though, because if it rhymes - it ALLLLLL Rhymes. as such I take up problem with this line: "Once we had commenced dating", if you would fit a "dated" in there if would flow more nicely. Also, the rhyming went a little off at times, and I wouldn't be so particular about this (because I'm not very skilled at utilizing the iambic pentameter myself) if it didn't rhyme. Again, I just have a thing with rhymes - if you want them, then they better be PURRRRFECT. Sorry haha just me. :-) But that's all the issue i take up with that, other than that it was liked a story being played out! Good job! :D Here's one that's rather dark: Fine by Sweetdang You came to me You knocked me down Shoved my face Straight to the ground. I stood up Brushed myself off I said "Fine." I came to you Stabbed you in the heart Left you in a pool Of your own blood You couldn't say Anything At all. hurhurhur don't ask. Okay yes both of what I've posted so far aren't "proper" attempts at writing, so when I post one, would you prefer a dark one or happy one? Mine are mostly dark. Quote
passiflora Posted April 16, 2012 Posted April 16, 2012 Nice poems! There should be a thread here dedicated solely to poetry; I love reading/writing. ^_^ Quote
jumpingbeans Posted April 16, 2012 Posted April 16, 2012 If someone wants to make a thread (I'm too lazy too), I'd love to put some of my poems/stories in it. Quote
-Ryan Posted April 16, 2012 Posted April 16, 2012 I would but I fail at poetry so I dont think it should be me... Quote
jumpingbeans Posted April 16, 2012 Posted April 16, 2012 I actually like most everything about English - Poetry, Short Stories, Reading...just not Non-fiction, and...my teacher. Quote
billpika_x8 Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 In other non-related news, I danced when I learned Rick Santoroum dropped out of the presidential race. Quote
-Ryan Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 Wait he dropped out? Why? When? How? I am so out of the loop... Quote
keiwo Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 If someone wants to make a thread (I'm too lazy too), I'd love to put some of my poems/stories in it. a prose/poetry thread would be amazing! it might encourage me to start writing again :-) I vote someone makes it! Wait he dropped out? Why? When? How? I am so out of the loop... he had lost quite a few states and was also losing a lot of the tentative favour he had to Romney. he pulled out of the race about a week ago. Quote
passiflora Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 In other non-related news, I danced when I learned Rick Santoroum dropped out of the presidential race. I don't live in America, but I still think this is good news. :P I would but I fail at poetry so I dont think it should be me... If someone wants to make a thread (I'm too lazy too), I'd love to put some of my poems/stories in it. a prose/poetry thread would be amazing! it might encourage me to start writing again :-) I vote someone makes it! I made one here but hopefully others contribute to it; I usually prefer reading to writing. :* Quote
sarahesque Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 I think there was a lot of dancing when Rick Santorum dropped out. I don't follow politics too closely, but the guy seemed to be a genuine creep. Quote
Tyler. Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 hello. hi. look at all you poets apparently i'm a really good writer, but I don't see it eh, politics, i just know that that guy was a complete idiot and, like sarahesque said, a creep Quote
-Ryan Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 OHMYDEARSQUIRRELS. -tacklehugs Tyler- Where you been, gurl? Quote
jumpingbeans Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 WHAT? TYLER IS HERE? OMG! WE'VE MISSED YOU, TYLER! Quote
Sakabato Posted April 20, 2012 Posted April 20, 2012 He tends to make occasional appearances here. Quote
jumpingbeans Posted April 20, 2012 Posted April 20, 2012 And then just randomly disappear. How saddening. :( Quote
Scoobean Posted April 20, 2012 Posted April 20, 2012 Hey everyone, I am new here and just wanted to introduce myself. I am Scott. Quote
jumpingbeans Posted April 20, 2012 Posted April 20, 2012 Well, hello there, Scott. I am JB, the resident odd-guy, along with half of the other members. My name changes twice a month. So you'll probably forget that I'm JB and just call me my current name. I don't mind. So, what brings you to our neck of the woods? Quote
Scoobean Posted April 20, 2012 Posted April 20, 2012 I want to learn more about neopets as I just started playing yesterday. Quote
jumpingbeans Posted April 20, 2012 Posted April 20, 2012 Oh, wow. You came a lot earlier than I, in that respect. I was on Neo for about 2 or 3 years before I'd even heard of TDN. xD Quote
Scoobean Posted April 20, 2012 Posted April 20, 2012 I just looked up Neopets forums and here it was. Quote
jumpingbeans Posted April 20, 2012 Posted April 20, 2012 Yeah, I guess it is TDN, which is first. So, what do you like/dislike about Neo? Quote
Scoobean Posted April 20, 2012 Posted April 20, 2012 Hmmmmm, that is kind of difficult to answer since I am new to it all and just trying to figure out my way around on it. I did however buy 3 petpets for my Skeith.. Quote
jumpingbeans Posted April 20, 2012 Posted April 20, 2012 ...I hope you know that a pet can only have one petpet at a time... Anyway, there's lot of cool stuff to do on Neo. TDN probably has a guide for what to do if you're a newb... Quote
Spritzie Posted April 21, 2012 Posted April 21, 2012 Welcome Scott. :) You've definitely come to the right place. Everyone is nice and helpful here. I have JB beat. :P I'd been playing for about 7.5 years when I joined TDN. Quote
-Ryan Posted April 21, 2012 Posted April 21, 2012 SOMEONE ELSE INTERESTED IN FOOTBALL OH MY SQUIRRELS. Quote
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