EXCLUSIVE Interview with Team Brightvale's Reb Weemelott!

[husker]

Greetings, Neopia, I am live in an Altadorian jail cell. Before the guards caught me for what they called “trespassing,” I managed to get an exclusive interview with Brightvale's star forward, Reb Weemelott. We were able to get the tape off to a fellow colleague before my cameraman and I were thrown in here. Let's hear what he had to say:

Hi, Reb, I'm Austin, a repo-

Reb: Look, guy, if this is about the money, tell Manny I'll have it next week.

Uhhhhh huh...

Reb: Aren't you from the Neopian Maf-

I'm a reporter...

Reb: Oh. Well, what could I do for you?

Well, I was looking to ask you a few questions about the previous offseason, along with Brightvale's plans to improve.

Reb: Ahhh alright, well as long as ya ain't part of any mafia of any sorts I'm good. Go ahead.

First question, Reb: For years now, you've been called the dirtiest player in the cup with your constant trash-talk and banter during games. What do you have to say to the public about this?

Reb: So a guy can't go out and play his game without getting criticized? Un-BELIEVE-able. See, this is how us Nimmos grew up. Playin' on the streets of the NC. The only way you could get to the other guy's heads was by trash-talkin' 'em up. I guess it carried over.

Interesting. Over the years you've made your background a huge part of how you play your game. Although you've been called a dirty player, you've done lots for the community. How has this affected your team?

Reb: Well, John, I th-

Uhhh, it's Austin...

Reb: John, Austin, same difference. Ya's both nice names. Anyway, as I was sayin' I think the team has improved with it. It really makes 'em want to get involved too. I like seein' the kids play Yooyuball on the new fields we helped fund. Listenin' to their stories really pushes you as a player.

It's very uplifting to see an athlete such as yourself care for the community. How do you think the stories will impact how you and Team Brightvale play this year?

Reb: Look, I think we gots a good shot at winnin' the whole thing this year. The team is motivated by the work we did this offseason, and face it, we gots the toughest team out there. We'll be workin' hard to win. If it requires a little dirt, so be it.

Reb, can you tell me what to make of these rumors about you being close friends with Altador forward, Winberto Seliz?

Reb: What!? A guy can't be buddies wit a guy from another team without getting questioned? Un-BELIEVE-able. Naw, jus' playin', we's close friends. In the offseason we’ll go out and do things.

Speaking of other teams, how do you feel about Meridell's recent climb to the top tier, while you guys still struggle in the lower tiers?

Reb: I'll tell you, they ain't nothing but a buncha no good dirty players. They do illegal tackles, passes, shots... you name it, Alfred. I don't like 'em one bit.

Last year, towards the end of the cup, we saw things flare up between you and Gordo Gunnels. How did that affect the team chemistry?

Reb: That was all jus' a big misunderstandin'. Me an' Gordo are cool. We's jus' competitors that's all.

How are relations bet-

Guards: I think he's this way! To the right! Other door! OTHER DOOR! There he is! Get him!

Oh, oh no, oooooooh no.

Reb: Awww shoot the guards. I'm innocent. INNOCENT. I did nothin' wrong.

Guards: We’re not after you, Reb. We’re after the trespasser!

Reb: Haha! So long sucka!

Cut the tape! CUT THE TAPE!

The guards then proceeded to tackle us and take us away. My cameraman was able to pawn the tape off to a colleague right before they got us into the chariot to take us to jail. Rumor has it that we we could be in here for quite some time, unless someone can get us out. Trespassing into the Colosseum is a major crime in Altador, especially during cup time. The only press that are allowed into the Colosseum are those with the appropriate badge, which I don’t have yet. I’m still happy we got the interview, even though he bolted out of the room faster than a fire yooyu once he saw the guards...

I just hope I get out of this cell soon. I have more reports to run.

Reporting to you live from this wonderful Altadorian jail cell, I'm Austin, and stay classy, Neopia.

Obligatory disclaimer: This news report is largely fictional, composed from various fan comments and the whims of our imagination in an attempt to inspire a sense of realism through our reporting. While we do our best to keep things reasonably neutral, this report is in no way intended to be a completely bias-free representation of the parties involved, nor does it claim to provide critical analysis of past and potential outcomes from qualified Altador Cup experts. If professional analysis is what tickles your fancy, take a look at our predictions (global/daily).

 

[voteforpedro333]

I hope I'm not the only one that read the entire thing in an Italian accent. Also I keep getting more and more worried about how Altador won't give any of TDN's team a press badge. Something we need to know about guys? :shiftyeyes_anim:

[persontired]

I hope I'm not the only one that read the entire thing in an Italian accent. Also I keep getting more and more worried about how Altador won't give any of TDN's team a press badge. Something we need to know about guys? :shiftyeyes_anim:

Hey, I got a press badge!

 

...Not saying I got it the right way...

[antiaircraft]

I hope I'm not the only one that read the entire thing in an Italian accent. Also I keep getting more and more worried about how Altador won't give any of TDN's team a press badge. Something we need to know about guys? :shiftyeyes_anim:

Nothing suspicious, it's just that new reporters take a while to go through the highly bureaucratic application process. :shiftyeyes_anim:

[Lydia Trebond]

And then you find out all the paperwork is for nothing when they dash out into the field with it still on their desk!

[husker]

I hope I'm not the only one that read the entire thing in an Italian accent. Also I keep getting more and more worried about how Altador won't give any of TDN's team a press badge. Something we need to know about guys? :shiftyeyes_anim:

 

I applied and went through the checks. I assumed I was good.

 

I guess that's where I went wrong.

 

This jail is cold. :(

[antiaircraft]

Guys quiet down, and hide the dynamite.

 

Nope, no heavy machinery or explosives here. Carry on people, nothing to see. :whistle:

[husker]

Day Two.

 

I'm not sure if there are even living beings out there anymore. It's just us verus the world, I guess. This jail ceel is cold and damp, but I believe we may have found a way out. We're scared to go though. We aren't sure of what awaits us. We haven't had and contact with anyone for what seems like days. I'm gong crazy. I need help. I need... help. HELP! HELP! SOMEONE HELP!