holladios Posted June 13, 2011 Share Posted June 13, 2011 Obligatory disclaimer: This news report was written to inform you all of the latest Altador Cup results in as entertaining a manner as possible. The rest of its content is largely fictional, composed from various fan comments and the whims of our imagination in an attempt to inspire a sense of realism through our reporting. While we do our best to keep things reasonably neutral, this report is in no way intended to be a completely bias-free listing of the day's results, nor does it claim to provide critical analysis of past and potential outcomes from qualified Altador Cup experts. Please note that the opinions formulated in this report are from a full team of different reporters, and in no way represent the views of only a single faction. If you're looking for 100% unbiased performance data, take a look at our standings page. If professional analysis tickles your fancy, you want our predictions pages (global/daily). <img src="https://images.neopets.com/items/bd_ixiscrown.gif" alt="Crown" style="float:left;margin:5px;" /> Good day to all of you dashing young faces of Neopia. As you are all aware I, like usual, am your mesmerizing host for today’s results, call me Smokey. Now im certainly not about to beat around the bush on this one. Yes, this is a crown on my head. Why? You ask? Well let me answer your question with another question. Why does every other king get a crown except for me? So take some time to ponder that one and get back to me whe- [Off camera] *snicker* “King of what?” King of my own intuitive presence, of course. [Off camera] ”But, uhh that makes absolutely no sense.” I don’t expect you to be on par with my level of intelligence, foolish cameraman. I come from an elite family of scholastic scholars. I cannot blame you for your ignorance of pure wisdom. Anyways we have some results to be tending to! Here come your Day 12 results! Kicking off tonight’s coverage is the match-up between Roo Island and Altador. Well, no surprises here to see the Rooligans claiming wins in Yooyuball, Make Some Noise, and Shootout Showdown. Leaving Altador to claim their usual win in Slushie Slinger. It seems as if the Roos have been on a bit of a winning streak the past several days. Hopefully this will inspire our colorful friends to keep the spirit alive for the rest of the competition. Up next is none other than the Kiko Lake, Maraqua showdown. Unfortunately for the Kikos it appears that their efforts just weren’t enough today to gather a win. Maraqua takes Yooyuball and Slushie Slinger, while Kiko Lake takes Make Some Noise and Shootout Showdown. With their win today Maraqua now sits in 4th place, giving the team both a great boost of positivity and excitement. It looks like the match-up between Krawk Island and Mystery Island has ended in a sweep. That’s right folks, Krawk Island picked up wins in every event, leaving the Islanders empty handed. Krawk Island has made it fairly clear that they want nothing more than to get back in the top four, and with today’s victory over Mystery Island I’d say they are on the right track to doing just that. <img src="https://images.neopets.com/altador/altadorcup/2011/teams/lostdesert_1.gif" alt="Luvea Trivon" style="float:right;margin:5px;" /> Yet another sweep has occurred today. This time in the Lost Desert, Moltara match-up. To the shock of many, Lost Desert seems to have woken up a bit, claiming wins in every event. Moltara has really lost a lot of its luster since defeating Altador, and it shows in the daily results. Now onto a more positive tone, with their victory, many fans now hope that a new chapter has opened for the Lost Desert crew. Hopefully for them they can use some of that champion wisdom to keep the sweeps rolling in. While we are on the subject of wisdom, I’d just like to note that I, your handsome host, happen to be very knowledgeable on many different levels. Sometimes I just say things that go over the common mind. So do forgive me for my elite form of intelligence which is so palpable and stupendous that any scholast- [Off camera] “Oh for crying out loud! Mr. Smokey, everyone here knows that you have two brain cells whom are fighting each other in that thick skull of yours! What are you playing at!?” *gasps* I have never! I refuse to sit here and be disrespected by lowly cameramen! I am going on strike! [Exits abruptly] [2 minutes pass] [static] Fine! I’ll go, where’s my crown? I need my crown people! That’s better. Welcome back everyone after that rude, unprofessional interruption. For those of you concerned, I think I’m going to be alright. Stop worrying about your hunk of a host and let’s get back to those results! The third sweep of the day came from the match between Shenkuu and Kreludor. That’s right everyone, Kreludor has turned a two day sweep streak into a three day sweep streak, picking up wins in every game. In claiming this victory Kreludor now sits comfortably in first place on the current standings. Shenkuu has to be down at this point, considering they have lost to 8 of the 12 teams that they have already faced. We can only keep our fingers crossed that things get better. <img src="https://images.neopets.com/altador/altadorcup/2011/teams/meridell_0.gif" alt="Yoris Obbles" style="float:left;margin:5px;" /> A bit of a surprise came from the Virtupets, Meridell faceoff today. To the shock of many, Virtupets received their first loss of the season in Yooyuball. Unfortunately for the Space Station, Meridell took wins in everything aside from Make Some Noise which went to Virtupets. Meridell is certainly a team to watch this season as they have managed wins against teams like Darigan Citadel, Terror Mountain, and now Virtupets. Who knows what the rest of the competition has in store for the Knights. Yet another surprise has occurred in today’s results. Haunted Woods has defeated Terror Mountain, taking wins in both Yooyuball and Make Some Noise, leaving both Slushie Slinger and Shootout Showdown to go to draws. Terror Mountain has had a pretty stellar year so far, but taking a loss to Haunted Woods like this has got to hurt team morale. On the other hand, Haunted Woods couldn’t be happier with their win against the Chillers. Goalkeeper Fanetti of Haunted Woods shared his excitement with us. “Can you believe it!?” cheered Fanetti of Haunted Woods. “We upset Terror Mountain! It’s hard not to be so excited about this win because we have been working so hard. I’d just like to thank our fans for their endless support. This wouldn’t have been possible without you.” The Brightvale, Faerieland showdown ended well for those in green and yellow. Brightvale swept the side games and took a draw in Yooyuball. Faerieland has been specializing in side games so far this season, and that’s where the majority of their wins are coming from. In order for the Faeries to move beyond 14th place they will really need to dig deep and pick up a few more Yooyuball wins. <img src="https://images.neopets.com/altador/altadorcup/2011/popups/darigancitadel/logo.png" alt="Darigan" style="float:right;margin:5px;" /> Now to the one everyone has been waiting for. The Tyrannia, Darigan match-up had to have been the most exciting of the day. Fortunately for Darigan they walked away victorious, taking wins in Yooyuball and Make Some Noise. This left Tyrannia with a win in Slushie Slinger and a draw in Shootout Showdown. Many Altador Cup enthusiasts were doubtful whether Darigan could handle team Tyrannia after their recent losses. Tonight they have been proven wrong, and fans of the Citadel have never been more alive. “Who's next!?” yelled one fan. “This one was for all the doubters. Darigan eats doubters for breakfast. Our power as a team has never been more prominent than it is tonight!” Among tomorrow’s match-ups to watch is the Shenkuu, Lost Desert faceoff. These two teams have really struggled this season and tomorrow they go head to head. Also, watch Lost Desert to be gaining momentum after their first sweep of the season. In addition to that, tomorrow is the Haunted Woods, Darigan Citadel match-up. Despite the fact that Haunted Woods is easily the underdog in this match, they are also coming off of a win against Terror Mountain with high spirits. Look for a few surprises here. <img src="https://images.neopets.com/items/clo_blumaroo_pitchfork.gif" alt="pitchfork" style="float:left;margin:5px;" /> Whats that? I’m receiving some last minute word of raging fans in the streets of Altador. It seems that Yooyuball has been all thrown off, denying fans to support their teams in today’s match-up. We can only hope that TNT management is working to fix this issue before the situation escalates any further. Until then put a helmet on and avoid the pitchforks! No, no that’s not a tear; I just got some hot sauce in my eye. [awkward laugh] What kind of a man cries? Certainly not me, nope. Never in my whole life. That’s the essence of a man for you. This is Smokey, LIVE in Altador. Until next time… You stay classy, Neopia. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jonathanjoseph99 Posted June 13, 2011 Share Posted June 13, 2011 Nice Article Smokey :) This post has been edited by a member of staff (Spritzie) because of a violation of the forum rules. Please keep your posts at 7 words or above. Please check your user inbox to see if you have been contacted regarding this incident, then review our rules. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Jackie Posted June 13, 2011 Share Posted June 13, 2011 I LOVE reading these!!!! ;D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Cheyanna Posted June 13, 2011 Share Posted June 13, 2011 Maraqua's first standings in the Top 4 EVER! :laughingsmiley: Im sooo happy ^^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-Ryan Posted June 13, 2011 Share Posted June 13, 2011 And that, my friends, is what DC can do. Hope you all enjoyed this and took plenty of notes. b) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Person335 Posted June 13, 2011 Share Posted June 13, 2011 Well done Lost Desert. I accept defeat from you. But don't think we'll let you off so easily in the next round! And now today we face Terror Mountain. Come on Moltara! Let's take the heat to their peak! (no, not the basketball team. that'll never work) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
manniqueen Posted June 14, 2011 Share Posted June 14, 2011 "You stay classy, Neopia." Is anyone else thinking about the anchorman movie as they read this?!?! :laughingsmiley: PS - finally some good times for LD! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
voteforpedro333 Posted June 14, 2011 Share Posted June 14, 2011 (no, not the basketball team. that'll never work) Oh man, basketball. My family was watching that game while I was off playing Yooyuball. I hope the Heat doesn't give Moltara a bad name. Good game, teams! And that was like, the most anticlimactic sweep ever. No movement in the standings. Does anyone know exactly the point system for the games? I thought we'd at least pass the Kikos in the standings with our 3 YYB to their 0, but I guess side games have some serious tier power. If I had to pick a finals right now with the top four, I'd want a Kreludor versus Maraqua game, because I wouldn't be able to choose who I wanted to win! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nikh Posted June 14, 2011 Share Posted June 14, 2011 Dc vs. HW. Brains Mortigan is going to lose his head this match! :evil: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Lyuba Posted June 14, 2011 Share Posted June 14, 2011 Should have seen the results this morning...as thrilled as I am that Maraqua is finally in the top four, I doubt it'll be for long. Our efforts are in vain...come tomorrow we'll be back in 5th place once again. We are stuck there and are doomed to be in 5th again for the third year in a row, doesn't seem like we'll ever get out of 5th. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
antiaircraft Posted June 14, 2011 Share Posted June 14, 2011 Does anyone know exactly the point system for the games? Yooyuball is the deciding game of any match - if you win Yooyuball you technically win altogether, although points-wise you can stay level with side games. A Yooyuball win is worth 1 match point, a draw is worth a third of a match point, and a loss is worth no match points. A side game win is worth a third of a match point, a draw is worth a ninth of a match point, and a loss is worth no match points. :) Should have seen the results this morning...as thrilled as I am that Maraqua is finally in the top four, I doubt it'll be for long. Our efforts are in vain...come tomorrow we'll be back in 5th place once again. We are stuck there and are doomed to be in 5th again for the third year in a row, doesn't seem like we'll ever get out of 5th. Maraqua has cleared most of its tougher opponents for the first round, so assuming the team remains consistent, they have a good chance of hanging in the top tier. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spritzie Posted June 14, 2011 Share Posted June 14, 2011 Should have seen the results this morning...as thrilled as I am that Maraqua is finally in the top four, I doubt it'll be for long. Our efforts are in vain...come tomorrow we'll be back in 5th place once again. We are stuck there and are doomed to be in 5th again for the third year in a row, doesn't seem like we'll ever get out of 5th. Awww :( Come on! We're doing great! The team has really been working hard. Plus, Altador was a lower ranked team, and we nearly swept them. Maraqua has moved up to spot 3! Let's keep it up. :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Lyuba Posted June 15, 2011 Share Posted June 15, 2011 Seeing today's stats, I can happily say that I was wrong indeed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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