Mummies March Merciless into Sensational Second Round

[Midtime]

HELLOOOOO, SPORTS FANS! And welcome back to TDN's coverage of the tenth Altador Cup! This is Brooke, reporting from the studio, where just about everyone is feeling refreshed and well-rested after the bye day. Or, if they're like me, they feel more groggy and cranky than ever! Hooray! So let's get on with round two.

The second round in the Alabriss bracket kicked off with sweeps galore as the new sets of teams went head-to-head. The sweeps started with the Lost Desert and the Darigan Citadel. The Mummies have only gone one day without a sweep so far this year, and today was not that day. The Minions were buried under the impressively consistent scores of the Mummies, making for a rocky start to the second round.

Next up, the Zombies and the Pirates did battle in a scene rivalling any zombie-apocalypse-swashbuckling-crossover film we've ever seen. The scores were close, but ultimately Krawk Island came out on top, pushing the struggling Haunted Woods further back in the pack. Despite their victory last year, the Zombies have been fighting to stay afloat, and currently sit in the bottom of the standings. The Pirates have had their struggles as well, but overall, they're not doing too badly at all.

In the third pairing of the Alabriss bracket, powerhouse Tyrannia took on the Ninjas. The Fossils now stand in third place overall, so it comes as no surprise that they brandished their brooms and took Shenkuu down on all fronts. The Ninjas haven't really contended for the Cup since AC IV, but they may yet hearken back to the glorious years preceding that, where they were a force to be reckoned with. Tyrannia has only had one podium finish in the history of the games, but they can certainly be intimidating!

Now, if my illustrious colleague has not locked him in another broom closet, I'd like to hand things over to Midtime for the next bracket. Midtime?

"Thank you, Brooke. I can gladly say that for now I walk free, if not exactly in the company of Matt at any time in the foreseeable future. After a meeting with our manager, I will also be making a concerted effort to link any jokes or wordplays I make to relevant current events. Now, let us not keep the Minitheus bracket results locked away any longer.

"Team Meridell, who have thus far triumphed over every other team they have met, did not flag in their match against Moltara today. Although the Knights played the same solid game as usual, the benches saw surprisingly little turnout for their supporters. Magma fans, few but earnest as ever, scored well in Make Some Noise, denying Meridell what could have been their second sweep of the season. Our interviewer described Moltara captain Aldric Beign as "stoically cheerful" when questioned about his team's performance, as well as "smelling distinctly of dust and expired bleach". Oh, my mistake. They were in fact talking about me in that last part.

"The Kreludor Moons, also undefeated in Round One, saw their week-long sweep streak come to a jarring end at the hands of this year's Cup favourites, Kiko Lake. The Moons certainly gave better on the field than most other teams have managed to, but the Kikos were unflagging, and the ferocity of their offence won out at last. Fans of the Moons were far from ecstatic at the resulting sweep, and many are looking to the team's game against the Faeries tomorrow to reaffirm their hopes for the championship.

"After ending the previous round with three straight losses, the Faeries have made a determined push back, edging Brightvale out at Yooyuball with a narrow 5-4. The match ended to much cheering on the part of Faerieland's fans - something you might have heard yourself if you happened to be anywhere in Altador at the time, and not in some sort of chamber insulated against sound, such as a broom closet. With so many strong contenders in the bracket, both the Faeries and the Wizards seem set for a very difficult second round.

"That is all for the new Minitheus bracket! We'll go to Matt for the remainder of today's report, while I finish meticulously praising his on-site performance in the weekly report I am penning to higher management. Pax vobiscum!"

Thanks Midtime, I see you've managed to free yourself...

[Matt mumbles something about installing a better lock for the closet.]

Anyways, the Vaeolus Bracket, which has undergone changes for this new round has mainly been filled with mid-tier teams. As there are no serious contenders for the Cup in the bracket, matches will be much more unpredictable! Spectators have already seen that sweeps will be uncommon for the next five days. With my trusty babysitter at my side, let's dive straight into the results!

Terror Mountain was able to pull off the only sweep of the bracket, cleanly defeating the Suns in all areas. The Suns' performance on the Yooyuball field paled in comparison to the Chillers'. Terror Mountain was once again able to make some noise as their loud cheers could be heard from the next stadium down! Although the Chillers have a medium fanbase compared to the powerhouse teams, Prytariel and her team were definitely able to rile up the crowd in yesterday's match. Coming off of their win against the Suns, the Chillers will face a more difficult opponent in the Robots.

Mystery Island and Roo Island faced off on the Yooyuball field yesterday, and while the Natives were able to take a close victory in Yooyuball, the Rooligans were able to pull off a side sweep. Similarly, Maraqua sideswept the Robots in yesterday's match, shorting out their circuits in the side games. Yooyuball was back and forth between the Mermaids and the Robots throughout the match, and after a magnificent goal by Virtupets Team Captain, Keetra Deile to tie up the match, officials ruled the match a draw after regulation time was finished. All four teams will be searching for an opportunity to overtake Terror Mountain in the bracket standings. From this point on, most teams have shaken off their Altador Cup jitters and are now starting to buckle down and focus on earning as many points as possible within the next few weeks.

Transitioning to our interesting matches of the day, we take a look at the match between Terror Mountain and Virtupets. This match will definitely be hard to predict given the Robots' tendency to perform erratically. Terror Mountain seems to have the advantage in today's matchup, but the Robots are a fierce team that is not to be underestimated. Spectators should also keep their eyes on the match between Krawk Island and Shenkuu. With excellent performances in Slushie Slinger and Shootout Showdown so far in this Cup, the Ninjas will be a challenge for the Pirates, who have not been performing at their full potential. Will this match be a wake up call for the Pirates? Find out in tomorrow's report!

That is all for our report today. This is Matt live from the studio signing off.

Obligatory disclaimer: This news report was written to inform you all of the latest Altador Cup results in as entertaining a manner as possible. The rest of its content is largely fictional, composed from various fan comments and the whims of our imagination in an attempt to inspire a sense of realism through our reporting. While we do our best to keep things reasonably neutral, this report is in no way intended to be a completely bias-free listing of the day's results, nor does it claim to provide critical analysis of past and potential outcomes from qualified Altador Cup experts. Please note that the opinions formulated in this report are from a full team of different reporters, and in no way represent the views of only a single faction. If you're looking for 100% unbiased performance data, take a look at our standings page. If professional analysis tickles your fancy, you want our predictions pages (global/daily).