"Letter" to the subscribers of the paper I deliver in the neighbourhood I deliver said papers in. [RANT]

[SillySilenia]

A little rant in letter-form that I won't actually send/deliver to any of my newspaper subscribers (no wish to get fired), but that from time to time I sure wish I could.

 

Bunch of not-so-dear subscribers,

 

Please stop complaining that your newspaper is a little bit wet. I had, in fact, noticed. Point is, there's a cloudburst occurring straight above our town (something I suspect you have noticed, as I can see a few of your more vulnerable potted plants/child's toys/etc. that normally are littered all across your driveway standing in your hall) and I am not, in fact:

 

- impervious to rain

 

- capable of magically teleporting your newspaper to your doormat or postbox (I'd have taken on more than one--admittedly huge--newspaper round if I was, believe me)

 

- capable of casting a magic rain-repelling ward over 1. your newspaper, 2. my bicycle bags, 3. me, 4. the driveway I have to hazardously cross in the dark (I notice that you still haven't replaced that broken light after eighteen months) to get to your front door/post box hoping I don't slip on or stumble over [Fill in one or more of the following: potted plants, children's toys, bicycles, wet algae and moss growing on the tiles, litter bags, benches, firewood, rocks and other stones, small tree that was uprooted a week ago and still is blocking half of the driveway, leaves that I suspect fell from their trees around August seeing as to their state of rot, hazelnut clusters from your hazel tree, rotting apples from your apple-tree] or 5. your door/post box.

 

- in possession of three or more arms, which I would need to make use of an umbrella while delivering newspapers. Not that it would be particularly effective when it's storming anyway.

 

I am also not capable of bicycling through your car without causing myself, my bike and your car damage. Thus, I have to remove the newspaper from my bicycle bags, where it's relatively protected from the rain, several feet away from your front door/post box.

 

Please also do not send in a complaint which ends up with me after passing through half the chain of command that your newspaper is supposedly late/not delivered without first asking the other people who both live in the same home as you and capable of reading if they have, perhaps, taken said newspaper from the post box/doormat. Especially not seven times in as many months, which means there is quite enough precedent that you ought to know your husband/wife/child/grandparent/brother/sister/spouse/housemate likes reading said paper as well.

 

Yes, even if you apologize to me next day.

 

The complaint remains registered altogether, I will still have to explain to the local distribution-point manager that yes, I did in fact deliver said newspaper and if too many of such false complaints happen in too short a time it is my pay that might be docked.

 

If you would also please refrain from commenting upon or complaining about the state of your newspaper when it is blatant even to yourself that it's your own post-box causing the damage/when said damage is because your dog chewed upon the newspaper, I'd be quite grateful.

 

Also, please take note of the fact that I do not control the printing of the newspapers. Thus, when the newspapers' site displays a warning or message that the newspapers will be delivered late due to issues with the printing this is not something I can do anything about. Holding me up to complain to me about it just results in all subscribers after you getting their newspaper with even more delay.

 

I also do not control the shipping of the papers across this (small) country and it is quite impossible for me to start delivering newspapers before they have actually arrived at the distribution point.

 

Nor do I magically control the weather. (If I did, it would not rain/freeze/hail/snow/storm about 200 out of the roughly 300 days a year I deliver the papers, believe me) If due to weather and resulting alerts

1. I am actually forbidden from starting delivery (has happened twice in over six years);

2. The newspapers don't get to the distribution point at all (happened thrice in over six years) or more than an hour delayed (happens a few times each year) or delayed by so much that by my contract I am not permitted to deliver them until next day (5 times in six years);

or 3. Ability to register complaints for said day is delayed either regionally or nation-wide until any particular time because even those high up recognize it's going to be impossible to deliver newspapers on time ('bout three-four times a year);

this is not something I can do anything about, nor could it logically be considered my fault.

 

If the complaints are not delayed nationwide/regionally (but may or may not be locally), but the weather is nonetheless obviously going to be a severe hindering/delaying factor, this is still not my fault.

 

Next time you see me struggling through three-five inches of some snow/slush/ice mix, or having to slow down to a biking speed of 5km/h due to storm, please rethink complaining about your newspaper being five minutes late and simply be glad it's not you having to spend two or more hours outside while dodging falling tree-branches or getting frostnip, frostbite and/or hypothermia.

 

(Count so far: Had no less than twice have a branch strike my bicycle fast enough to completely smash off/crush my back light. Got struck with a few smaller branches in the leg or arm about a dozen times, though thankfully never heavy or fast enough to break anything. Tend to have to pluck about twenty twigs and leaves out of my hair every time it's storming. About 120 counts of frostnip, roughly equal number of near-hypothermia and mild hypothermia and roughly a dozen counts of (thankfully localized in a small area with little to no permanent damage) the beginning of second degree frostbite in 6.5 years.)

 

While I know that it's tradition for me to wish you all a happy new year and for you to then give me some money for having delivered your newspaper in return, it is quite okay with me if for whatever reason you opt not to--be it feeling my delivery over the past year had too many issues, be it that you're financially tight, be it that you're principally opposed to giving money (one of the nicest new-year gifts I've ever had was a set of three jars of honey from one of my subscribers, whose brother had his own bees) or any other reason (and no, you don't have to explain to me why).

 

However, if you don't want to give me money, please either don't bring up the subject at all or outright say so. Stringing me along three times in a row because you supposedly don't have any money home just to give me all of €0,10 the fourth time really is not a good way to endear yourself to me. I don't expect huge amounts. I don't expect you to always be home, have time and have the money on hand even if you know that time of the year is coming up.

 

However, having to take a few minutes time out of my already somewhat tight delivery schedule four times for 10 cents...

 

Frankly speaking, I consider €0,10 for a full year of delivering newspapers to you (in other words, about 300 times), to be an insult in any case, far more than not giving me money ever could be.

You pay a toilet lady more than that for a visit to the toilet. You wouldn't even consider "tipping" a waitress 10 cents for one restaurant visit and her delivering your food from the kitchen to your table.

 

Essentially, you're saying that my delivery is worth about 1/30th of a cent per newspaper to you, and each of those four visits rank at about 2.5 cents for about five minutes, aka .5 cent per minute.

Don't. Just don't.

 

With less-and-less regards and love per day,

Your Newspaper Deliverer

 

P.S. To each and every subscriber who is now worrying because they think they recognize some of their behaviour from this letter: it's almost certain I'm not speaking about you. The folks I'm angry at are the ones that refuse to think from any perspective but their own. Sure, nearly every one of you has at some point done something that may have been a minor annoyance, but that's quite okay. It's the (double) handful of you that systematically do things like the above that I am really getting rather pissed off at.

[carlyle]

:mellow:

 

I am a bit taken back by what you said here, but found it to be pretty interesting. I like to think I have grown up from my pointless-whining-and-complaining phase, but reflecting upon accounts of living/working conditions considerably worse than mine motivates me to endure whatever I go through.

 

Your description of your job worries me though. I assume it is a part-time job, but does the pay justify going through those conditions? Do you have no other choice but to do your job? Could you describe more about the context behind taking the job?

 

Because of the environment I live in, I can already tell that I live a much easier lifestyle than you do. Thus, I can't empathize with what you go through, but I feel that your anger has justification.

 

Take care.

[nightfall8705]

Some people never grow out of their petty complaining over simple things. However, I have to echo, does your job justify your conditions? I've sort of been in your boat when I helped a friend do her paper routes. We got to drive, but we had to get up in the middle of the night and be up all night, delivering before dawn, with the windows all the way down and the temperatures freezing. Even when it was raining, we had to be out there. Some things in your post, I do agree with though. it's not your fault if the weather is bad. It's not your fault if delivering a paper is dangerous, whether it be to weather, or to obstacles that make it difficult to do your job correctly, and it's also not your fault if papers never arrive to the distribution on time, or if there is a delay, but I can offer a couple of tips.

 

You can talk to your boss about any struggle you have on your route regarding the plants, lights, dogs, etc in the yard, whatever makes it difficult to deliver your papers, so that they can speak with the customer about it. It should be agreed that your safety be a priority.

 

Knowing specifics of your route each night is crucial. You need to know who gets a thrown paper, who gets a paper in a tube by the mailbox, and who is on vacation, or who has special requests. Mark it in a notebook with your route sheet if needed.

 

Also knowing the weather on an hourly basis is crucial. Automatically, any throw papers go in a bag that's deflated and tied, but in the event of rain or much moisture in the air, all papers, as a courtesy, throws and tubes should be double bagged, deflated and tied tightly. This ensures that there are no wet papers, and it also shows the extra initiative that you took to ensure the customer had a dry paper. Arriving extra early for your route to pick your papers up is also a good idea, so you have time to double bag all of your papers for the night before you go out in the rain helps.

 

If somebody's dog drags the paper off the stoop and chews it up, it's really not your fault. Things like that happen.

 

People seem to think that delivering papers are for young paperboys and papergirls on bikes to do because it's "so easy" an idiot can do it, but that's really not the case. Delivering papers are difficult, especially in extreme temperatures and weather conditions. Some complaints may be justified by the customers, but complaining about every little thing... I understand people pay for their papers and expect them there on time and in pristine condition, but sometimes things happen to prevent that, and it's not always the carrier's fault.

 

There's definitely a communication issue involved, and I have sympathy with the OP in their frustrations, as a former member of the paper business myself.

 

I hope that things regarding your job get resolved and get better, OP. Just do your job the best you can, and stay safe out there!

[SillySilenia]

Carlyle:

Yeah, part-time. For most people, it's about an hour a day six days a week, but I just have the luck of having a newspaper round with both a large number of subscribers and having them spread out a fair bit. At last count, I had twenty streets I normally would not have to go through except that exactly one subscriber lives at the end of it or that it's the only way to reach such a street.

 

Depending on circumstances (and barring the extremes), I tend to spend between 90 and 120 minutes delivering through the week and about 120-150 on Saturday. That's excluding the time to get from my home to the distribution point, the time to get the papers in my bag, get to the start of my route and get home from the end of my route (admittedly, the latter would be about 30 seconds. Two-doors-over is a subscriber so I tend to plan my route around ending with him rather than opposite side of town)

 

All in all, my newspaper route is highly variable depending on subscribers but generally hangs somewhere between 7 and 10 kilometres I have to travel. Most newspaper routes are closer to three because the subscribers live closer together. (I have exactly two streets which are both short and have five or more subscribers, one street that has five subscribers but the distance between first and last would be nearly a kilometre if taking the most direct route and I have to take several de-tours to reach other subscribers. Most other streets have 1 or 2 subscribers or none-but-have-to-pass-through to reach another street.)

 

The pay... depends on the point of view. On its own, probably not. When considering that at least the activity means I don't have to sport and thus don't pay for any sports memberships, it helps slightly.

What's the main issue, however, is that I am on partial welfare due to health issues--mostly psychical, a few physical that on their own would not be enough--and that I can be about 99% sure that if I drop my newspaper round and don't find another job* I will either be forced to apply for jobs as long as government rather than me thinks I should be capable of doing them in my current condition/with my current issues, or lose my partial welfare altogether.

Neither are real options.

 

Originally I took it while I was still in our equivalent of high school, as some pocket money. Despite that being over six years ago, I have not actually started earning more (indeed, I currently earn about 10% less than I used to for about 10 (if going by amount of subscribers) to 25% (if going by area travelled) more work. Result of there once upon a time being a lot of advertising attachments that we got separate pay for, but with the economy being as messed up as it is, few of those happen now.

 

Pay-wise... pretty nice though even then not quite amazing for, oh, a 15-16 year old. Outright ridiculous for a 22-year old. Even worse when considering that about half the money I make gets docked off my welfare. =/ (Yet if I did not have said job, I'm likely to either not get said welfare for "lack of motivation" or be essentially forced into jobs I currently am not capable of holding)

 

Weather conditions can't be helped, I'm afraid. I'll readily admit that part of the frostnip and hypothermia issues are that I have the tendency to automatically shut out any and all signals of hunger, cold or pain especially if they build up gradually, thus me having to actually focus to notice them half or more of the time and otherwise only noticing a fair bit later than most. Currently being underweight after a string of minor--but annoying--illnesses doesn't help my cold-resistance, either. However, that's only part of them. The other part is simply because, frankly speaking, the higher-ups generally don't give a [insert-swear] if it's -10C and there's four inches of snow on the road meaning you can't even bicycle but have to walk while dragging your bike with you. The newspapers have to be delivered anyway. Hasn't happened for a bit (not that combination), but had about six weeks straight of that a few years ago. Well, five or so. Think it was the '09-to-'10 winter.

 

Annoying subscribers... can't really be helped either, though in two cases I've actually told them off after they really crossed the line. (One of them had a neighbour I used to babysit for, managed to get my phonenumber from her and actually called me at home to complain his newspaper was wet. I was not happy. Last time he called me. Last time I babysat for his neighbour. The other had the nerve to complain about a late newspaper when the newspaper site outright stated that the newspapers would likely be either several hours late or not delivered at all. Karma struck a few days later, though, as said pain-in-the-behind slipped on the frosted-up snow that was causing me serious delay and broke his leg. Since then, he's a lot more understanding when it comes to weather-related delay, I can tell you that much.)

 

*something that's not particularly likely with both my issues and the current state of the economy, let alone including that due to my issues I am technically a drop-out. (That is, I have done the exams independently (state exams during summer) in about 85% or so of my subjects, but that's not enough to get a graduation paper -sigh- Real life has been interfering in getting the last few done. Between glandular fever, a few times when my depression caused some issues, my maternal grandmother dying, my paternal grandmother getting a brain haemorrhage and likely to be death within weeks, my boyfriend having his own health issues and a whole lot of other things going on, exams weren't exactly priority. Still aren't.)

 

Nightfall:

My newspaper round is of an afternoon newspaper, though I personally consider "evening newspaper" to be more correct considering the times between which they have to be delivered.

 

I can talk to my boss about it, yes. Problem is, my direct boss doesn't actually have access to that information, and the one above him doesn't do anything that's actually useful. If I want or need to get something done, I have to deal with it myself. If not, either it doesn't get solved or it takes the better part of a year.

 

We have a list of our subscribers and any changes each day. Since I've had about 75% of this route for over six years (another part was merged into mine last year when the numbers of subscribers town-wide no longer were high enough to warrant five separate routes), I am extremely familiar with the specifics.

 

We don't have thrown papers as such. We have either outside postboxes or in-wall/in-door postboxes or post-slits. As such, we don't have bagging for the papers. Which means that they go unbagged into my bicycle bags. Just the way things work around here, unfortunately.

 

Exactly. Some complaints are valid or at the very least understandable in that the customer cannot be expected to know the circumstances that led to issues with the delivery. I certainly don't hold those complaints against customers--even if there were circumstances outside my power as long as they could not know about it by casting a single look outside or on the paper's site.

Similarly, things can happen that result in one particular address being a bit difficult to access for a few days or a few weeks. Don't hold that against them, either.

 

In my personal experience, though, at least 80% if not more of the complaints I've gotten in the past two or so years either are

1. not valid (people complaining they haven't had a newspaper just to find out an hour later that their wife had already put it away, and then not actually bothering to recall the complaint),

2. technically valid but not logically sound (a fair part of the weather-related complaints),

3. technically valid but not my fault (issues with the printer, issues with transport, the remaining weather-related complaints), 4. frivolous (under normal circumstances, all newspapers should be delivered by 18:30PM. I've once had a guy send in a complaint that his newspaper was late. (Separate category from "No newspaper"--it's even literally marked as "I have had my newspaper, but it was late" to prevent double-delivery) Logged time of complaint? 18:31PM. =/ I consider that to be more than a bit childish.)

5. Seriously exaggerated/outright lie. (There's this one subscriber that I admittedly have delivered the newspaper late twice in the past month-and-a-half. Neither case by much and in one case caused by weather circumstances (rapidly-falling snow making it impossible to see more than maybe ten feet ahead). If they'd log a complaint for that other time--or even both--I'd fully accept it. However, they claimed their newspaper was late more often than not and that it rarely came in before 7PM. Even the two times it was delayed, it still was in before 7PM. =/ Thankfully, no one takes his complaints all that seriously. He's part of the route that was merged into mine last year and all five deliverers before me since he subscribed have had issues with him.

 

That's not to say I never make mistakes--I certainly do from time to time--but after delivering newspapers for about the 2000th time, I suspect that I am a bit less likely to make them than the young guys and girls that take the job and quit again three months later.

 

It also helps that I know most of the subscribers pretty well and because the majority of them (the reasonable ones anyway) know that 1. barring really extreme circumstances, I don't deliver late and 2. barring really extreme circumstances, I don't fail to deliver, they're also more likely to assume that if the newspaper was late, there probably was a good reason for it.

 

They're also more likely to solve things with me instead of ranting-but-not-listening or going over my head and logging a complaint. Mind, the system is there for a reason, but if there aren't any re-deliveries (in case of a missing paper) or replacements (in case of a damaged paper) needed, it's not a particularly effective way of dealing with things, either. (In fact, even for those things it's not quite effective. Wouldn't be the first time that the message that a paper had to be re-delivered got through two days late ><)