~Xandria Posted December 19, 2012 Share Posted December 19, 2012 Hello all! I'm happy to report that I found a very cheap physciatrist in my area. I'm finally starting to seek the treatmeant I've needed for so long. On/off I would see physc's but I always stopped going because (at the time) I was so depressed I didn't think it would even make a difference. Now, though, at this point in my life; I have the support of my boyfriend who is forcing me to get help. I can't say I mind. I know I need it. I keep telling myself this is a good thing, but inside I'm shaking with fear. I had my first appointment yesterday. Overall I found the doctor to be very helpful. She answered all of my questions and took all of my thoughts into consideration. This is something that I previously never experienced with a doctor, so I have to admit it was a huge relief. She decided to put me on Cymbalta for depression and pain and also Klonopin for anxiety twice a day. I've took Klonopin before and it's helped me with my social anxiety and panic attacks, so I was happy about that. In regards to the antidepressant though, I'm completely terrified to take it. I've always been this way though. Doctor's would throw A/D's at me and I'd take them for 3-4 days and give up (not near enough time to see if they actually worked). Reason being, I would go online and read all of these horror stories about how bad the withdrawls are from A/D's (brain zaps, severe panic and agitation, nausea, among other scary side effects. Not to mention all of the possible side effects while taking the drug. I know I shouldn't let this discourage me. I do this to myself EVERY TIME. I read these things on the internet and I freak out, thinking they are going to happen to me. I know I need to give this drug a chance to work. I've been so depressed lately that I sometimes don't even want to live. I mean, I have to do SOMETHING. At the same time though I'm afraid of having to take them for the rest of my life. I might have to and that scares me... I guess I'm just looking for support from other's here who have to take antidepressants as well. Sorry for the long rant. :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karmacow Posted December 19, 2012 Share Posted December 19, 2012 Even reading the little piece of paper that comes with medications, the one with all the side effects, is enough to make most people paranoid. If makes you feel any better, I think you'd usually start feeling the side effects pretty quickly after starting the new medication. I once tried some medication that made me lactate :P I was taken off those pretty quickly! Anyway, I hope these antidepressants will help you :) And hopefully you'll only need them for a while. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
April Posted December 19, 2012 Share Posted December 19, 2012 I understand the feeling of not wanting to start a new anti-depressant. It's can be a little overwhelming. Okay, more than a little. It's frightening, but in the end I think it's worth the risk. I know what it feels like to be depressed, I struggle with it on a daily basis. I know how it feels to not want to wake up in the morning. I often find myself wishing that I could die without consequence, meaning no one would be affected by it. I think that's what stops me. It's awful, and I'm really sorry you feel this way. I definitely think it's worth the risk, just try and keep it in mind. You're doing this for you. Obviously you want to get better if you're talking to someone and getting help. Maybe the side effects won't be great, but no one wants to feel so down. That's not living. And if it's too much for you, you stop taking it and talk about trying a new one. I will say this. I don't even know you but I think you're an incredibly strong girl to be seeking help and giving this a try. You have my support and if you want to message me, I'd be more than willing to listen. I've been where you are, and on my bad days, I'm right back there again. I can empathize with you, and sometimes people need to know they're not alone. As I said, you have my support. <3 Best of luck. ~Xandria and hanalways 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rebecca~ Posted December 19, 2012 Share Posted December 19, 2012 -hugs- Taking new medications are always super scary, since you don't know how your body will react to them, or what the side effects will be. But you can do this. You can work with your psychatrist if there are any problems. You just need to stick with it, hun. <3 You can do it! I am so glad to hear that you're seeing someone again, sweetie. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~Xandria Posted December 20, 2012 Author Share Posted December 20, 2012 Karmacow - You are so right. Usually I skip reading the little piece of paper for that reason. I told myself that I wasn't going to look up side effects online. Curiousity got the best of me though, I ended up reading the reviews for Cymbalta and it was given a number of 6.7 overall. Which isn't bad honestly. At least that means it's helped more than it's hurt. & Wow, I've heard of lacatating can happen from certain medications. That has to be a scary side effect!! I hope I will only need those for awhile, but I doubt it. Thank you for the support. :) April - Thanks so much for your reply. It made me feel a lot better about this whole thing. Sounds like you go through a lot of the same things I do. I'd love to be able to chat with you, so I'll probably take you up on that offer. :P No one should have to feel this kind of pain. I mean... it's kind of a mind numbing, disconnected, feeling. A feeling that fills you with dread, like each day is going to be worse than the last. Not to mention all the physical manifestations of depression. Today I took my first pill. No bad side effects yet, so that's a relief. It just sucks that you have to take them for months to see any kind of improvement. I have been on antidepressants before, and I haven't had any luck with them. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that this one will help though. Thank you for the compliment. Like I said, you really made me feel a lot better. :) -HUGS- Rebecca - Thanks for your support Rebecca. <3 I really appreciate it. I'm terrified but I'm going to try my absolute best to stick with it. Rebecca~ 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
April Posted December 20, 2012 Share Posted December 20, 2012 ~Xandria~ I agree. It's an awful feeling, and I'm so sorry you have to experience it. Lots of people don't get that depression can be physical as well. Lots of people don't get it in general. My parents are always saying to me, "what reason do you have to be depressed? You're not starving." And it's just awful. Which is why I find it's important to have people that do understand. You can't help how you feel and if you didn't have to feel depressed, you wouldn't. It's not a choice like so many believe. I'm glad I helped a bit. I'm always so unsure about being so honest online or trying to reach out to people. I'm not very good at it, but it really makes me feel happy that at least something I said helped. ^^ Keeping my fingers crossed for you as well. :D ~Xandria 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~Xandria Posted December 20, 2012 Author Share Posted December 20, 2012 Thank you hun! Absolutley nobody in my family understands. I'm not really good with social situations so I don't have any friends, which is why I go online to talk to people for the most part. :) I hope one day that anxiety/depression won't be looked down upon & that better treatment options come available soon. Best of luck to you and your journey towards happiness. <3 Rebecca~ 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poptart123 Posted December 20, 2012 Share Posted December 20, 2012 I have been where you are and I know the struggle all too well. If you ever need support, someone to talk to, to vent or rant, ANYTHING please don't hesitate to message me. In the mean time here is an e hug *hug* :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
passiflora Posted December 21, 2012 Share Posted December 21, 2012 I've never taken antidepressants, but I think people can have the same reservations when starting any new medication. You could try to think of it as reassuring to know that they've identified the side effects - that means it's been well-studied. Anything advertised as some sort of miracle cure with no side effects actually seems much more sinister to me. Remember that side effects are usually uncommon and you can always let your doctor know if you do experience any. It sounds like your new doctor is super awesome. :) I hope it continues to go well with that doctor, and good luck with your medications! Being scared is totally understandable, but you can do it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angela_339 Posted February 21, 2013 Share Posted February 21, 2013 I've been on many anti-depressants (Effexor, Prozac, Paxil, Cipralex, Celexa, Wellbutrin) and am also on Klonopin for anxiety, I've been on so many because it can be hard to find the right one for you, I think I finally found a good combination after 4 years of taking them on and off, Good luck to you though! My mom just started Cymbalta and it's also good for chronic pain which she has too, she seems to like it so far, hope it works for you! I'm currently on the combo of prozac and wellbutrin plus klonopin for anxiety and zopiclone for sleep and I'm feeling waaay better than I have in a long time, the only one I had really bad withdrawals from was Effexor, but yeah it can be really rough having to try new ones and wait 4-6 weeks to see if they work for you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AcyOS Posted February 23, 2013 Share Posted February 23, 2013 It's a good idea to avoid the Dark Side of the placebo effect, especially with psychiatric medication! I make a point of only looking these things up after I've been on them for a while. I do have a problem with "is this still working?" though- going off meds for a few days just to verify that, yes, I am still a wreck without them. It's a terrible habit and I know I shouldn't do it, but I can't help but wonder how else I would know whether I still need them or not! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eightbitdimwit Posted March 5, 2013 Share Posted March 5, 2013 I was on anti-depressants in my teens for awhile. The way I see it, some of these things are like a blip in the brain's processing and the medication - regardless of how long you need it - makes it so that you're able to express yourself more naturally. I know that's how I think of my anxiety and the possibility of needing medication for it now: I didn't ask for this and I just want to do what I want and not what my condition wants. Even if it's for the rest of your life, you'll be able to live the rest of your life being you and doing cool you stuff without depression butting in. Not sure how much that helps, though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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