The joys of life...

[moni_rawr]

Do you ever feel like your life is just spiraling down?

 

 

 

All in all, it's just one enormous mess that's been happening as of lately.

[skylee]

i'm really sorry about all that going on :( that's happend to me before, where i feel like i've been trying and things are getting better between me and the other person, only to have them tell me its getting worse. it's definitely heartbreaking.

 

i am a firm believer in keeping relationship issues private. i dont believe its really anyone else's business. especially with family. once family memeber begin to develop a negative opinion it takes soo much to reverse it. unless you are being abused or its something extremely serious, it should be kept between the couple.

 

don't feel negatively about yourself just because you haven't had the best luck with relationships. people make mistakes. as long as you learn from them and don't repeat them, just see them as a learning experience. i'm very sorry you've been in abusive relationships in the past. no one should have to put up with that. always remember that you deserve to be treated with dignity and respect.

 

as for the birth control, if the hormones are affecting you in such a negative way, have you considered non-hormonal forms like the mirena?

 

i really hope you are able to figure everything out. its very hard when you have to decide if you should end a relationship or not. you have to decide what's best for yourself. if the other person doesn't care to hear what you need or your opinion about things, they are being very selfish. i hope everything works out for you. if you ever need to talk let me know :)

[Rebecca~]

I am so sorry that this is happening. :( Relationships are usually a bit complicated, but it sounds like you're really having some issues. I've been in a somwhat similar relationship with a friend, where she kept telling me that it seemed to her like I didn't care about her at all, when I was constantly trying to be more like how she said she wanted me to be. I offer hugs if you want them!

 

(Oh, about Mirena and other IUDs- they're fantastic forms of birth control, but there is a reason why they are often recommended for women whom have given birth before- it requires the cervix to be opened for it to be inserted, which can be (isn't always!) quite painful if the receiver hasn't had the cervix opened that far before- ie, during birth. But I do recommend that you talk to a doctor a bit more, find out about other options for you.)

 

I think, that if it was me in your situation, I would probably sit down with your partner and say most of what you said here to him. Use lots of I statements- I feel that you aren't as concerned about our financial situation as I am, etc. Phrase them in a way that isn't attacking (I statements are great for that, before it's just about your feelings, I feel, I worry, I think, It seems to me, etc.) but really let him know how you are feeling about. Let him know that you are concerned, but that to you, moving back to live with your parents is a last resort that you would rather not do. I would say it straight out, tell him explicitly that you would rather work with him through all the stress you're under than break up. But that you don't feel like you have other choices if he doesn't start supporting you in the changes that have to be made in your lives to keep the relationship working, etc.

(I know it's easier said than done, especially with the issues you're having with your hormones. :()

 

Just remember that you are doing what you can. You are the one that is trying to make it work. But ultimately, you have to look out for yourself! Someone who isn't willing to work for the relationship to succeed does become a toxic element in the relationship.

 

If you need to talk more, I'm always here!