State of (Un)rest [Style Question]

[livvy]

So I've been working on a story for quite a while, and just recently began co-writing with Theo, 'cuz he's awesome and such. :yes: Anywho, I hate to give you a random piece of the middle of a story, but this is my first time co-writing, and I'd really appreciate some opinions on how well the styles blend.

 

Basically, through reading these sections, if I gave you two coloured high-lighters and told you to highlight the parts I wrote and the parts Theo wrote in different colours, could you? (Hint: Theo's sections are the better-written ones. ;) (Don't deny it, Theo! :angry: (He will.)))

 

 

Caught!

 

Later that evening, Annie went down to the hold as instructed by Captain Rourke. “Look a’ the wood nice and close,” he’d ordered in his heavy Irish brogue. “If any’s cracked or leakin’, ya want ta’ patch it with some tar. Wouldn’t want us t’ be sinkin’, now would ya?” She stopped first in the broom closet - Jacob insisted it had a ship name, but Annie could never remember it - to pick up a bucket of tar. The sun was just low enough in the sky to light the small room perfectly, and Annie found the tar with no trouble. She removed the lid curiously, and almost immediately replaced it and staggered backwards, coughing furiously to rid her lungs of the noxious fumes. Her shoulder banged painfully against a rough wooden spar, sending her reeling off in another direction, and she was barely able to regain her balance without toppling over altogether. Maybe bringing the tar down first wasn’t such a good idea.

 

Returning to the hold, Annie bent down and began to walk slowly around its edges, inspecting the wooden planks and beams “nice and close”, as the captain had put it. She certainly didn’t want to miss any breach that might put the ship at risk, but still she fervently hoped she wouldn’t find anything that would require her to drag that suffocating concoction back down with her. She vaguely wondered if tar was so useful for ensuring the hull was watertight because the water couldn’t stand to be anywhere near it. If that were the case, perhaps it would be sufficient to simply dump an especially large vat of tar somewhere near the middle of the ship.

 

Alas, it wasn’t long before the murky shadows of the hold resolved into the unmistakable black lines of the hull’s omnipresent water-stained cracks and crevices. Annie indulged in a loud, exasperated groan before she turned and made her way back up to the orlop deck. As she plodded her way along towards the foremast, she spotted a small grey rag laying in a corner, soaking in a puddle of water that had pooled during the last storm. Quickly, she stooped to snatch it up, pressing it against her face in the hopes that it might offer some protection from the noisome stench. Unfortunately, her newfound shield also served to impair her vision somewhat. So much, in fact, that as she rounded the next corner she let out a yelp and smacked squarely into Jacob.

 

“What in the name of- Oh! Annie! I’m so sorry!” He rushed to help her up. “Are you all right?”

 

“I’m fine Jacob. There’s no need to apologise, that was my fault. I wasn’t watching where I was going.”

 

“Well it’s hardly a surprise if you were walking about with this over your face,” Jacob remarked, picking up the rag. “Whatever is it for?”

 

“Er...” Annie began, her face flushing slightly, “I was hoping it might help with the tar.”

 

“Ah,” answered Jacob sympathetically, “well, the ship’s not going to sink if we leave a small crack or two for a few hours. The captain’s sending me to check up on our instruments in the navigation room. Would you care to join me for a bit?”

 

Annie was struck by a sudden flood of relief. An evening with Jacob was far preferable to the prospect of hours spent down in the hold, battling choking fumes in the darkness. More importantly, the navigation room held within it the ship’s clock, so she could be sure that she wouldn’t be late. “I’d be delighted.”

 

While Jacob enthusiastically explained the importance of one of the many brass gauges and instruments in the Nav Room, Annie’s eyes kept flickering back to the ship’s clock, her attention fully elsewhere. It was nearing 8:00. The other girls would be waking soon. The gambling tables would open at 9:00, and Rajani’s men would be roaring drunk by 9:30. And then, the plan would kick into high gear.

 

“That’s really interesting Jacob, but-”

 

“Isn’t it?” Jacob enthused, his eyes fairly shining. “I’m learning all I can about them so maybe I can run a ship myself one day. It’s complicated, but I’m a quick study. And Captain Rourke’s agreed to teach me, maybe let me navigate in a few years. If you want, I can...” His narration cut off when a large yawn escaped Annie’s lungs. “Oh, I suppose it is getting rather late. If you want to go to bed, I’ll just finish checking the instruments in here.” Jacob turned his back to her, but Annie had already seen the hurt in his face.

 

“Sorry Jacob,” she whispered as she left.

 

When Annie reached her own room, she walked straight to the small chest containing her things, snapped the latch open, and removed the large gold pocketwatch her father had given her for her 15th birthday. The one good thing you ever did for me, Father, she thought as she held the watch face in the warm light of the oil lamp. 8:32. One hour. Annie slipped out of her uniform, feeling the chill air only briefly before replacing the dress with warm night-clothes and tucking herself under the covers. She whispered a quiet prayer, then blew out the light in the lamp and closed her eyes.

 

 

Ana awoke roughly, thinking for a sleepy second that she had woken to an earthquake. The earthquake soon resolved itself into the face of Anisha, who was shaking Ana’s shoulders urgently. “Ana, you’re awake!” she cried as soon as Ana’s eyes were open. Ana nodded and sat up, feeling slightly dizzy. “Sorry,” Anisha continued, “but you wouldn’t wake up, and I was really starting to worry. We told Hafiz you were feeling sick and couldn’t dance today and that we’d stay and take care of you” Ana glanced over and saw Chanda nodding vigorously. “which I guess worked out for the better because someone would probably notice if three of the dancing girls went missing in the middle of a show and-” Ana put her left hand on Anisha’s shoulder. Anisha silenced immediately. With her right hand, Ana retrieved her quill and pad of paper and penned, “Slow down.”

 

“Right,” Anisha chuckled. “You can’t read that fast. Sorry.” Ana smiled.

 

Chanda walked over and crouched with Anisha by the mat. “So,” she whispered conspiratorially, her pretty eyes twinkling. “Now that we’re here and alone, how are we going to do this? What’s my assignment?”

 

Ana looked critically at Chanda, half in dance costume and half in travelling clothes, wrote something on her pad, and held it up for Chanda and Anisha to read.

 

Chanda mumbled the words as she read them. “Actually, Chanda, you should go dance.” Chanda looked up at Ana and pouted indignantly. “But why should I go dance? I’m so tired of performing for those horrid men. All they can do is whistle and stare and throw money. Well, I suppose I don’t mind that part so much, but it’s degrading! Send Anisha.”

 

Anisha shot Chanda a sour look. Then she smiled sweetly and said, “But Chanda, you’re so very much better at dancing than I am. You’ll be a much better distraction.”

 

“Surely I’m worth more than a simple distraction,” Chanda returned, a hint of pleading mixed in with her self-righteousness. “Besides, we already have Yakub at the gambling table, and enough alcohol for those pigs to forget their names, let alone the location of their tent.”

 

Before Anisha could reply, Ana shoved the sheet of paper on which she’d been writing between them. “We need a look-out,” it read, “in case one of the men gets up from the table. You’ll have to come warn me and Ani.”

 

“Oh. Of course I can do that.” Chanda angled her chin up a little, looking satisfied. “So how shall I signal? Whistle? Make some sort of bird noise?”

 

“Ana wouldn’t be able to hear you if you did that.”

 

Chanda’s chin returned to its proper elevation. “Right. So I just run and get you? But they’ll notice if the best dancer goes missing!”

 

“I’m sure you’ll think of something,” Anisha said flatly. Ana stifled a giggle.

 

Chanda opened her mouth to protest just as the first strains of music floated into the tent. “Alright,” she said, hopping nimbly up and completing her costume. “I guess I’m off. I’ll be sure to watch their table closely.” She turned and exited the tent with exaggerated suavity in her usual swagger, muttering under her breath, “As much as I can stand to look at them. Though I suppose Asim isn’t too bad...”

 

Anisha shook her head. “That girl...” Then, turning to see Ana’s questioning face, “Never you mind. Let’s go walk around a bit. Keep our eyes on the tent.”

 

The pair of girls made a loop around the encampment, avoiding anywhere they might be seen by curious customers or wandering troupe members. Even so, Anisha made a great show of supporting Ana while they walked, in case anyone should happen to pass by. After several such circuits, Ana stopped and instructed Anisha to drop her by the tent, and then go check on Yakub at the gambling table. He’d give her a signal if all was going as planned. Anisha agreed, and the two parted.

 

Once back at the tent, Ana began gathering materials. She put her paper and quill on her mat to take with her, and began digging through the pile of unwashed dancing clothes. From this she unearthed several coins, which she tied up in a scarf that she then wound several times around her wrist, such that the coins made no noise when she moved. In case we have to run. Satisfied with her arrangements, she picked up the pad and pen and stationed herself by the tent flap, on the lookout for Anisha.

 

Anisha returned in due time. Her step was carefully casual, neither harried nor languid; her expression markedly unconcerned. For a moment Ana really did feel sick. This was their only chance. They were too close to the city of the raj; the troupe wouldn’t stop again unless in extreme emergency, and very little was an emergency to Hafiz. Perhaps if a girl went missing... but it was too dangerous here to send anyone out. The city was surrounded by an oasis of lush greenery, cultivated there at the king’s behest and now flourishing quite well on its own, along with all the creatures one would expect to find in such a jungle. No, to send someone out there would be murder.

 

“We should hurry Ana,” Anisha whispered, the apprehension in her voice belaying her calm exterior. With a brave smirk, she added, “Who knows what kind of trouble Chanda will get into while we’re gone?”

 

Ana returned the smile, nodding vigorously as she glanced nervously around.

 

“I should lead the way, I can listen for anyone who we might have to sneak around,” Anisha went on. Sensing Ana’s anxiety, she hesitated and gripped Ana’s arm tightly. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

 

I’m sure, Ana thought as she reached up and gently pulled Anisha’s hand away. Before either of them could have any more second thoughts, she was already striding boldly into the darkness, with Anisha hurrying to get ahead of her. Soon they were already halfway through the camp, with the sounds of drunken revelry carrying faintly on the wind. Anisha put a finger to her lips as she crept forward - an unnecessary gesture, but somehow it seemed appropriate.

 

Time seemed to dilate as they pressed onward, and more than once Anisha halted in alarm at some whistle in the wind or rustle from a small lizard. Even the shadows seemed dark and uninviting tonight, their silent glares of disapproval filling the air with malice.

 

And so it was that their destination loomed out of the ground without warning, as if it were some vicious predator that had been lying in wait for them all along. The two girls stopped just short of it, blinking a little in the unexpected light.

 

“I’ll go in first,” hissed Anisha, continuing before Ana could object, “if there’s anyone still inside I can try and explain myself. I’ll signal to you right away if it’s safe. If it isn’t, go and hide as best you can. I’ll be all right.”

 

Without waiting for Ana to agree, Anisha took in a breath and stepped calmly forward, pushing her way into the tent as confidently as if it were her own. Moments later, she stuck her hand out back through the entrance, beckoning with one finger. Ana darted in after her as quickly as she dared, tentatively pushing the tent flaps aside.

 

They had made it inside.

 

“Ana,” Anisha piped up as she walked towards one of the several trunks, “what exactly is it we’re looking for?”

 

Ana didn’t answer. It was almost habit now to ignore anything she couldn’t see. After a brief pause, she heard shuffling and a sheepish chuckle, then Anisha turned her around gently and repeated the question. Crouching down, Ana drew a sketch of the bottle Savitr had shown her several days ago, writing under the rough drawing, “Poison.”

 

“But what about the ‘gift’ Yakub mentioned? What if they’ve already poisoned... whatever it is?”

 

Ana bit her lip. She hadn’t thought of that. She stood and shrugged apologetically at Anisha, while scuffing out the drawing with her toe.

 

“Well then, we’ll just keep looking,” Anisha said with a chipper smile, but her voice was laden with doubt.

 

[uhh... there will be more writing here, I just got lazy had inspiration for the later bit that I didn't want to lose.]

 

“Chanda!” Anisha cried in surprise. Ana felt the tension in her shoulders alleviate slightly.

 

“Oh Ani, you must get Ana immediately! Savitr, he’s coming to the tent. He got up from the table, shouting something about getting gold pieces...” Ana’s tension returned, focusing this time in her legs. Her eyes darted to the scarf around her wrist. They could run. All three of them. She had enough to get them several cities away, maybe to a small village. Yakub would take care of Rajani, somehow, and she and the girls would hide out until it was safe. Or until the raj died, and then Rajani would forget all about them. They could travel, dancing for money as they needed it. Chanda had always gotten attention wherever she went, it wouldn’t be difficult to get customers; Ani was graced with such a frank, sweet smile, she could surely charm a townsman into giving them a place to stay; and she, well she could... oh, what good was a deaf gypsy girl out on her own like that? She cursed the whole situation. Her life was now on an even keel with her lies: both equally likely to end badly. And why was Chanda still talking?

 

And then, she wasn’t talking. She was screaming. And so was Anisha. And Ana’s resolve fell apart. She turned - that is, she would have, if someone hadn’t done it for her. Someone placed a rag over her mouth and held it there as she struggled against him, clawing at his arm and kicking hard, all the while trying not to breathe in the sickeningly sweet fumes. The man turned her around roughly and shoved her toward the entrance, where two other men held Anisha and Chanda. Chanda still fighting against one of Rajani’s younger gang members - Ana didn’t know his name - and Anisha, hanging limply in the arms of Asim.

 

“Well Asim,” gloated the voice above her, the voice which unmistakably belonged to Savitr, “look who’s spying now.”

 

The coldness with which Asim looked down at her now took Ana by surprise, and she momentarily forgot the vital importance of holding her breath. As she inhaled, the sweet odor filled her nose, so much so that it was nearly suffocating, and the world around her began to go dark. The last thing she saw was Asim, who had been so kind to her before, picking up Anisha like a sleeping child and saying, with an almost lackadaisical air, “Well, I guess we should get rid of them.”

 

First Impressions

 

[in this section, Ana was tied to a tree by Savitr and attacked by a tiger. Taika was introduced and thankfully saved Ana. I removed it because 1) it was quite long and 2) it was entirely Theo's, so there would of course be no style changes.]

 

Reading the Signs

 

Ana leaned unsteadily against the tree, rubbing her wrists tenderly as she gazed up at the stranger who had rescued her. There was something strangely familiar about the lines on the woman’s face, almost as if they belonged to someone whom she had crossed in the street only yesterday. This was impossible, of course, as there hadn’t been a true road in sight since they left Baroda several days ago, and in her own world she hadn’t seen dry land in months. Still, there was something. It was certainly a striking face, easy to remember but difficult to match to its owner. Perhaps it was someone she had known before joining the troupe.

 

The woman turned abruptly from examining the ropes which she had cut away from Ana’s wrists moments before, fixing the girl with a piercing, fiery gaze. Ana flinched instinctively, and she couldn’t help but notice the blood beginning to dry on the stranger’s dagger, which she still clutched menacingly in one hand. The woman didn’t seem particularly happy about the patch of blood that had stained her clothes either.

 

“Aap ka naam kya hai? What’s your name, girl? Where are you from?” the traveller asked, tension in her voice as she knelt down to face Ana.

 

The girl hesitated slightly, pulling away as she made to stand. But before she could react any further, the woman lunged swiftly forward, grabbing her chin firmly in one hand and pinning her head against the bark. Suddenly there was the all-too-cold feeling of sharpened steel resting on her throat.

 

“Listen, whoever you are,” the woman hissed angrily, “it’s not my job to run around the forest looking for lost girls and fending off tiger attacks. I’ve been stabbed in the back too many times to just go ahead and trust some random person I’ve never met before. Hell, there are people I’ve known for years that I still don’t trust, so unless you want me to tie you up again and leave you behind, you’d better explain exactly who you are and how you wound up out here.”

 

As the woman spoke, her white face framed by orange-red hair, Ana felt oddly as though the tiger hadn’t really left, and had simply transformed into the woman now similarly pinning her to a tree and equally willing to take her life. She squirmed slightly, but the knife stayed pressed against her throat, stopping any words she may have said in response. Slowly, making no sudden moves, Ana traced in the dirt her name.

 

The woman sighed, releasing Ana’s chin as she shifted her weight. The dagger didn’t budge.

 

“Don’t give me that,” she grumbled irritably, “otherwise we’ll be here all day with you scribbling in the ground. Don’t try and tell me that you can’t speak either - I can see your lips twitching, and don’t think for a second that I missed you shouting when I first showed up.”

 

Ana swallowed hard, clenching the fistful of dirt beneath her hand. Her mind raced as she fought habit with necessity - the need to preserve a necessary charade with the need to preserve her captor’s patience. Though her throat was dry and the blade pressed painfully against her neck, she answered aloud. “I can speak, but I cannot hear. I read lips fairly well...” She coughed. The jungle air was heavy in her still-heaving lungs. “I don’t remember... where I’m from. I’m an entertainer. My troupe recently passed through... I was brought here by... one of Rajani’s-” Ana broke off. She was consumed by the nagging feeling that she knew this woman’s face, that she had seen that dagger somewhere before, that she had somehow heard Rajani’s name in connection with the woman.

 

The stranger frowned deeply for a moment. She seemed unconvinced, but evidently she had decided to shrug her doubts off, as she withdrew the dagger and slipped it back into its sheath. As she stood, she moved to scratch the back of her head thoughtfully, and the expression that crossed her face seemed almost sheepish. Almost.

 

“Fine, I guess that sounds about right,” she said finally, offering a hand to Ana. “Sorry about the outburst. The last person I found tied to a tree tried to stick a pistol in my face. But then I suppose he didn’t have a tiger about to eat him at the time. You’re Ana, right? Nice name. Easy to remember. My name’s Taika. I’m a thief. Pleased to meet you.”

 

The nagging recognition exploded into clear memory. Taika! The strange thief the rani had sent to investigate her scheming nephew. Ana wanted to tell Taika everything she had heard Rajani telling his men - altering the story, of course, to Yakub hearing it, as she had done for Anisha and Chanda - but at the same time, wanted nothing better than to run away. A thief, she knew, was never all on one side. Ana couldn’t trust her. Yet. And so she sat in silence, staring up at this tiger-faced thief.

 

The woman smiled slightly at Ana’s reaction. “Relax. Thieves aren’t all that bad you know. I have a few old colleagues who weren’t too different from you back in the day. Besides, I’m not exactly your average thief - if I was, there would probably be a lot more people using tigers to guard their valuables.

 

“Now come on, you’re not just going to sit there all day,” she continued, stretching her hand out a little further. “You can wait for me to leave if you want, but I have a feeling you’ll have a rough time finding your way back home.”

 

Home, Ana repeated in her mind as she took the hand she had been offered and stood. This woman couldn’t possibly realize just how far from home she really was. Ana let out a resigned sigh. The woman didn’t seem particularly concerned however. She was already moving to grab her belongings, glancing around dubiously as she did so. Her gaze soon fell on the bloodstained bruise that was showing through Ana’s hair, prompting her to walk briskly over.

 

“Turn around,” she ordered curtly, then, “never mind, stand still. This looks bad.”

 

Ana held still as she felt her hair being parted and fingers running down the back of her head. The woman was muttering under her breath as she examined the wound, using words from a foreign language that Ana suspected were far from polite. Without warning, one of the fingers pressed down sharply, forcing a gasp of pain out of Ana’s lungs. She twisted away in surprise, but the thief made no move to stop her. Instead she was shaking her head sadly, a worried look fading away to be replaced by what Ana now recognised as her customary frown.

 

“It’s not as bad as I thought,” she pronounced, “but you should get proper treatment from a healer. You said you were brought here by someone. One of Rajani’s servants? A man?”

 

“Savitr,” Ana fairly spat, holding her hand over the wound on her head. It still smarted terribly. “He knocked me out somehow... not with the tree, before that, and he... he dragged me here, or carried me, I can’t remember.”

 

The woman bent down suddenly, alarmed, and gently laid a hand on Ana’s shoulder. “Are you hurt anywhere else?”

 

“Anywhere else...?” Ana inspected her arms and legs curiously. “No, I... I don’t think so. Not by Savitr, anyway. The tree wasn’t terribly kind to my back...” The underlying meaning of the woman’s question suddenly struck her. “Oh, no!” she gasped, her face reddening with a mixture of horror, disgust, and embarrassment. “He didn’t... n-no, nothing like that.”

 

The woman picked out another word from her rather expansive arsenal of exotic curses. “Well that’s fortunate at least. Any idea how to get back to your troupe?”

 

“No,” Ana answered, “I was passed out. I can’t remember anything.”

 

“Good,” Taika replied tersely, turning away seemingly to inspect a suspicious tree branch of some sort.

 

“Good?”

 

“If you were out the whole time, then it can’t have been far, and men who are stupid enough to wander through the forest into tiger territory tend to leave more signs than a herd of rampaging elephants.”

 

Taika moved in to examine the branch more carefully, then seemed to come to a decision. “This way, let’s go. Before something else out there smells that you’re wounded,” she added ominously, striding forward into the undergrowth without even a hint of hesitation.

 

Ana moved quickly to follow her, almost at a run, but she soon found that she was only able to keep up with great difficulty. The thief set an infuriating pace, slipping past entangling vines and thick clusters of leaves with seemingly no effort, yet every now and again stopping to stare at a scratch in the bark or an overturned rock, sometimes for minutes on end. Eventually Ana took to trailing Taika at her own pace, making sure to keep her in sight and catching up whenever she paused to make sure they were on the right track.

 

Even after slowing down, Ana’s head was reeling. The blood pounded painfully in her wound, the foliage and stones Taika so easily cleared clawed angrily at Ana’s legs and arms and snatched at her already tattered clothes. Running was becoming more and more draining, and Taika was having to wait longer for Ana to catch up.

 

After waiting nearly seven minutes at the same branch, Taika grew impatient. When Ana finally arrived, she crossed her arms and asked irritably, “Are you going to make it like this?”

 

Ana gasped for breath to respond. “Am I... Yes, I can make...” Ana’s legs folded underneath her and her knees made painful contact with the rough forest floor. “No, I’m not,” she admitted miserably.

 

“Rest,” Taika instructed tersely, perching on a large boulder, her dagger close at hand in case some curious animal got a bit too close. Once again, Ana was distinctly reminded of a tiger, preparing to pounce.

 

“Why didn’t you run?” Ana demanded.

 

“Hm?” The woman half-acknowledged her, never taking her eyes off the brush around them.

 

“The tiger,” Ana said between short breaths. “Why didn’t you run? Why did you... why did you help me? You can’t have known that I...” Ana broke off. It wouldn’t be wise to inform a spy that she herself had been spied upon by four unsuspecting teenagers.

 

The spy in question turned her gaze towards Ana, studying her curiously, as if she somehow suspected what Ana had been about to say. “I may be a thief, but that doesn’t mean I don’t make stupid mistakes sometimes.”

 

Ana closed her eyes, too tired to convey her offense. “So saving my life was a mistake?” She opened her eyes again, looking for an answer.

 

“Well, let’s see,” Taika responded, glancing back towards the surrounding greenery, “how much am I going to be paid for it?”

 

“Paid? I can’t...” Ana replied haltingly. She remembered the scarf full of coins and felt for it. It was gone“I have nothing to pay you with.”

 

“Well then, considering that I was about a heartbeat away from being turned into a tiger’s evening meal, with you reserved for dessert, yes, saving you was definitely a mistake, and a stupid one.”

 

And considering that you just insulted your best source of information on the raj’s nephew... Ana bit her tongue so hard she could taste blood. “Well, you seemed to come out okay,” she retorted lamely.

 

“I was fortunate,” answered Taika, shrugging. “Bhāga are bloody fast. The one you ran into was more cautious than he should have been, and even then he almost had me. So I was stupid and lucky. That’s worse.”

 

Ana dropped her eyes to the dirt, effectively ending the conversation. One good thing about being deaf, she’d learned: people couldn’t talk if you weren’t looking at them.

 

Muttering yet another incomprehensible word under her breath, Taika hopped nimbly off her boulder and took several rapid strides off into the distance. Ana looked up in alarm, afraid she might actually be left behind. The woman suddenly stopped and, with a shake of her head, began to turn around.

 

“Well fine, if you really want to know that badly,” she conceded. Ana was surprised to see a wry smile on her lips. “Back when you first saw me, you told me to run.”

 

“Which you ignored,” Ana stated coldly. “And?”

 

“And most people in your position would have called for help instead. So thanks. I appreciate it.” Taika turned to go, and Ana, blinking at the thief’s unexpected admission of compassion, stood and moved to follow. Taika spun on her heel to face Ana and added with a smirk, “Oh, and I hate taking orders.”

 

 

And, uh, yeah, it's kinda long. ^^

 

And since you were probably expecting pretty artwork in this part of the forums, here's a rough attempt at Taika, whom you'll meet in the above writing.

[antiaircraft]

(Don't deny it, Theo! :angry: (He will.)))

I object! I OBJECT!!!

 

And yes, we'd both appreciate comments on how out styles blend. xD

[Midtime]

Well, in general I forgot to look for the difference, since the writing was so very good. But there was nothing that disturbed my reading, so I can probably say any discrepancies are perfectly acceptable. :D