Team Captain Interview: Leera Heggle of Team Lost Desert

[antiaircraft]

Disclaimer: This news report is largely fictional, composed from various fan comments and the whims of our imagination in an attempt to inspire a sense of realism through our reporting. While we do our best to keep things reasonably neutral, this report is in no way intended to be a completely bias-free representation of the upcoming season, nor does it claim to provide critical analysis of past and potential outcomes from qualified Altador Cup experts. If professional analysis is what tickles your fancy, take a look at our global predictions.

 

 

Over the past four years of the Altador Cup, Team Lost Desert has earned a reputation not so much for tenacity, subtle gameplay, or raw ferocity, but simply for their confident, unshakable playing style. Given any conditions, against any opponent, you can expect this steadfast team to hold their ground, keep their strategy intact, and play their strengths remarkably (almost perfectly) well. And come the next match, they'll do it again. Blood and sweat has earned them consistently high rankings throughout the history of the cup, and this year they stride onto the field with the unmistakable title of powerhouse and top-tier cup contender. We were fortunate enough to be able to spend a few minutes with the Lost Desert's goalkeeper and renowned team captain, Leera Heggle, and ask him a few questions about the coming season.

 

A very good day to you Captain Heggle, thank you for joining us for this interview.

Leera Heggle: Not a problem little man. So, we're here for some sporting talk, are we? Well, let's get started.

 

All right, how about we start with a little introduction of yourself and your team?

Heggle: Well, you seem to have done a good job on that one already. (laugh) My name's Leera Heggle, or "The Bull" as my team sometimes calls me, and I've been playing Yooyuball for the Lost Desert since year one of the Altador Cup. I'm the team's goalkeeper, and I also hold the position of team captain. It's not often you see the goalie in charge, but the job fits me well, and I make sure we all stay in shape. Over on the practice field you can see our defenders, Luvea and Lamelle, and our forwards, Vonde and Derbi. They're practising deflection and scoring patterns right now, which is why I'm sitting down with you instead of running back and forth bellowing like a maniac.

 

So then, your team is well known as a consistent performer in the Altador Cup, and it's a popular choice among analysts as a candidate for the top spot this year. How do you see your team's performance faring in the upcoming season? Will you hold steady like before? Improve by leaps and bounds? Perhaps slip a little with the increased competition?

Heggle: Slip? Not a chance in a thousand flaming years! The heat's been turned up a notch this season, and with last year's finish the pressure's on to deliver. Heat AND pressure - now there's a recipe for diamonds that I like to see! Our training philosophy is to improve every step of the way. The more this year's competitors throw at us, the better we'll perform.

 

Let me phrase the question on everybody's minds directly: Do you think your team will take the cup home this year?

Heggle: Most definitely! I'm not settling for anything less.

 

Of course, there are a lot of hopes riding on you and your team this year. If, hypothetically, you didn't manage to win the championship, do you think there'd be a lot of anger from your fan base directed your way?

Heggle: (snort) You think our fans would be angry? That's nothing compared to what I'd be cooking up! If we don't get a victory this year, then this team had better be ready for a long off-season of rock hard training, because I'm not letting them off until we do.

 

Sportsmanship and friendly competition are always cited as critical pillars of the Altador Cup. However, past incidents between team supporters (often referred to as 'unadulterated flamewars') have lead many people to question whether people actually take this concept seriously. What do you have to say on this matter?

Heggle: What do I have to say? The same as any athlete worth half his name in any sport. When you play, your game and your team come first, everything else, including your pride, last. The same goes for supporters of any kind. Focus on your people and your play, and treat every last one of your competitors with respect, on or off the field - only then will you have something to be proud of. Fail in that, and you fail in everything.

 

What would your reaction be if some of your own team's supporters started engaging in unsporting activities?

Heggle: If any of those immature screaming imbeciles have the nerve to call themselves Lost Desert supporters, then they'd better find a nice, big rock to hide under real quick.

 

Moving on to a more personal question: You're frequently thought of as the 'Sergeant Rock' of your team - tough, rough, and ready for anything. However, rumour has it that you have an aversion to Ice Yooyus. Is there any truth in the scuttlebutt?

Heggle: (long laugh) Well, I'm not sure how I'm supposed to answer that. Hold on for just a second.

(At this point, Leera Heggle sidestepped quickly onto the field and grabbed a passing Ice Yooyu - it was a very impressive manoeuvre. He continued holding the Yooyu for the rest of the interview.)

Heggle: Now, not many people have actually held an Ice Yooyu before, so I'll describe what it feels like. The first thing that hits you, immediately after you grab it, is the shock of the cold. If you're not prepared, you won't be able to handle the pain and it'll drop right out of your hands. If you manage to keep a hold of it for a while, then the immediate cold goes away, but soon after that the chill starts setting in, and that's far worse. As time goes on, the cold starts creeping up your arms and into your body, making you numb and sometimes even messing with your head. Scorers have it worst off: they need to keep a tight grip while dodging around and setting up a precise shot. Sometimes, if you hold one of these for too long, the numb feeling starts to fade and your arms feel a bit better. Careless amateurs usually think that's a good thing, but once you get that far the cold can do some serious damage. I've seen far too many good training days ruined by frostbite. So, do I like Ice Yooyus? No. But do I know how to handle them? Yes. The same goes for the rest of my team. If anybody thinks Desert pets don't know how to handle the cold, I'd be happy to take them on a night trip.

 

So, you've been captaining Team Lost Desert for four long years, with a fifth soon to be under your belt. Although you've already stated that you won't be standing down until your team claims the cup at least once, do you have any plans for retirement at all? What's in the future for you if your team does manage to top the podium this season?

Heggle: Retirement? I'm just getting started! I'm a Yooyuballer from start to finish. I always have been, and I always will be. If I'm not standing on the field alongside my team next year, then I'll definitely be coaching them from the sidelines.

 

Okay then, we've come to the end of this interview, and it looks like your team is waiting for you to get back on the practice field. We'd better finish this up.

Heggle: With a thunderous cheer worthy of a packed stadium! LOST DESERT FOR THE CUP!

 

Well... actually I was going to thank you for your time, but I suppose that'll do.

Heggle: (laugh) Indeed it will. We'll see you on the podium then!

 

That concludes our first interview of the season, but it won't be the last! We'll do our best to arrange some sessions with more team captains as the season progresses.

[tempdisplay]

He sounds like a great Team Captain ;) A bit pushy though! It mus have been scary interviewing him :O Good Luck Lost Desert!

[voteforpedro333]

Now that's my kind of team captain! We need someone motivational like that to get our team spiffed up and raring to go. I wonder if I could grab his autograph :laughingsmiley:

[-Ryan]

Just how I would've imagined him, and lol at the ice yooyu. xD'

 

Can you interveiw Layton sometime? I hear he hangs around at the bar outside of the petpet arena every saturday afternoon and most weekdays. :P

[antiaircraft]

Can you interveiw Layton sometime? I hear he hangs around at the bar outside of the petpet arena every saturday afternoon and most weekdays. :P

We'll see if we can catch him, assuming Noog hasn't already triggered a blanket ban on all journalists at the bar. :P

[CAV of Gang Green]

Can you interveiw Layton sometime?

 

Yes. Please interview him and the other captains that are in my siggy. (I still count Dasher as captain)

[antiaircraft]

Yes. Please interview him and the other captains that are in my siggy. (I still count Dasher as captain)

I can say that, apart from Vickles, one of the captains in your signature has already been interviewed, and another has an interview already scheduled. ;)