Foxy! Posted October 12, 2006 Share Posted October 12, 2006 I have these new poems that I wrote last night, and I'll post the first few here. They are about a fictional romance, except for one, and I have a note after that one-:) The romance blossoms throughout the poems. Btw- I love free verse. its like song within a book, or in this case, a forum. ----- I see you walk up to me and yet, even though I know we're just friends I'm glad you can't see the goosebumps crawling up my arms, the paralyzing feeling tingling my spine, My heart racing just waiting to say hi to you. ----- I'd like to be sitting under a willow tree, looking into your eyes, and placing grapes one by one into your mouth. Instead I'm sitting on a bus, looking at your DVD player, and placing Lucky Charms one by one into your mouth. Close enough. [This is the one based on the true story- I was sitting on a bus on the way back from Savannah, and I was watching his DVD player, placing Lucky Charms one by one into his mouth, while the bus was (quite romantically) driving through downtown Atlanta at 10:00 pm. That was a really good day.] ----- These are the first 2. Make sure to review these! I really want some feedback, mainly cause I'm too afraid to show my friends... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lutarist Jake Posted October 17, 2006 Share Posted October 17, 2006 Cool! And a little touching actually. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Foxy! Posted October 17, 2006 Author Share Posted October 17, 2006 Whee! Finally, someone reviewed them! I thought that no one liked them... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.Dan. Posted October 21, 2006 Share Posted October 21, 2006 Awww,that was so sweet. It isn't the typical lovey-dovey stuff,because of the modern input. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Foxy! Posted October 23, 2006 Author Share Posted October 23, 2006 Okay, heres the next 3: My mouth sings, my hands drum, my eyes read, my ears listen, and yet, my mind wanders, thinking of you. ------------------- I sit next to you, exchange some friendly jokes, and hold a conversation with you, when I'd like to stand on my chair and scream my very thoughts out to the world ------------------------ My eyes lock on to yours my thoughts erase except for one and suddenly I know you're thinking it too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lutarist Jake Posted October 23, 2006 Share Posted October 23, 2006 I love youI love you That's a little lovey-dovey isn't it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Foxy! Posted October 23, 2006 Author Share Posted October 23, 2006 Maybe a bit, but that's how my sister said she felt when she liked a guy... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lutarist Jake Posted October 26, 2006 Share Posted October 26, 2006 Did you base this on your sister? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Myriad Posted October 30, 2006 Share Posted October 30, 2006 These are REALLY good!! They're so emotive. My sister would like them, she loves poetry and she's good at it, like you. :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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